The Words I Need To Say
by Vytina
Summary: Good little girls marry a wealthy man. Good little girls don't worry about marrying for love. Alice was done being a good little girl...and right now, it felt good to break the rules...with him.
1. Chapter 1

Summary:

Post-"Make 'Em Laugh". Alice Pleasance has broken up with her fiancé and moved on with her life, or so she thinks. When the newspaper headlines announce the Mad Hatter lying in a coma, Alice's life gets thrown through Wonderland once again. While she tries to keep the past locked up, she finds herself remembering all the times with the Hatter, and she begins to question where her heart really belongs.

Pairings: Alice x Jervis

* * *

Prologue: First Meetings

The door of the apartment opened and swung shut behind the tall, slender blonde occupant. Alice Pleasance pulled off her dark red coat and hung it neatly beside the door. Work had been many things today, and 'pleasant' was not among them. She was looking forward to a long night alone…well, almost alone.

"Cheshire?" she called out softly, patting her leg gently, "Cheshire, where are you? Come here, sweetie."

A soft meow preceded the appearance of a charcoal colored kitten that emerged from beneath her couch. She smiled and scooped her pet up, bringing her into the kitchen for a little snack—for both her and the kitten. Cheshire hopped up onto the glossy counter, eagerly awaiting her milk and, if she was lucky, catnip.

Fortunately, it appeared that she was in luck, as Alice presented the month old kitten with the desired treat. She snatched it up and trotted off to a corner to enjoy the tasty snack. Alice giggled. "A little sensitive, are we?" she asked, shaking her head and pouring a glass of water for her. As she took a long drink, she noticed the paper poking out from under the door. Casually, she pulled it out and unfolded it to the front page. Before she could take another sip, however, her eyes widened and she let out a gasp, seeing the headline:

**HATTER GETS HATTED: MAD HATTER IN COMA AT MEDICAL CENTER**

"Jervis…"

Alice gripped the paper tightly as she read through the article with wide eyes. She could hardly believe that her former employer had managed to be afflicted by his own creation. She bit her lip slightly. If Billy were here, he would have said that the Hatter deserved what he got. But then again, he wasn't here.

And neither was the ring.

For a long time, her hand had felt oddly bare and naked without the stone, but after a few weeks, the emotional and physical feelings of no longer being engaged faded, as though they never existed. She was tired of other women at work still asking her why she wasn't engaged, and she was even more tired of making up excuses that were nothing short of lies. If she told them that, in one opinion, Jervis Tetch—the Mad Hatter—had broken up her relationship, she was certain he would be crucified by the media until he died. Not that he wasn't already. Billy had always taken great pleasure in agreeing with the, in Alice's opinion, absolutely awful things the news had said about Jervis since he became known as the Mad Hatter. But she would never see him as that. He was still Jervis Tetch to her. And Billy just couldn't understand or accept that. He couldn't—or rather, wouldn't—see why she continued to be protective of her former boss. Finally, tired of the endless fighting, Alice broke off the engagement and moved out of his house.

Since then, she'd been so busy at work to really think or worry about Billy, or even Jervis for that matter. Honestly, she'd stopped counting the number of times he'd been captured by Batman, and after a while, she stopped wondering where he was and what he was doing. Try as she might, despite what the media said about him, and what everyone else said about him, she just couldn't hate Jervis. She didn't know why. She really didn't. According to her co-workers, there wasn't a reason to _not_ hate him, but still, 

Alice felt responsible for his madness. No doubt Gotham would be happy to know he was incapacitated; happy was the last word she would use to describe her mood right now.

* * *

Later that night, Alice was sitting on her window ledge, Cheshire curled up at her feet, licking her paws. From her apartment, as though designed by some crude trick of fate, Alice had a clear view of the Gotham Medical Center. She wondered if she could see Jervis' room from here. Of course, the only way to answer that question was to go and…

No, she couldn't. She couldn't go and visit him. Even if she had the courage to do so, there was no guarantee that Jervis would want to see _her_. After everything that happened…she had caused his madness. Perhaps if she'd just understood what he had been trying to tell her before…maybe then…

"Oh, Jervis…" she whispered aloud, "If only I was certain you didn't hate me…"

_

* * *

_

Wayne Enterprises, four years ago:

"Alice Pleasance?" a tall, stern faced woman with red hair, slicked back into a high ponytail, "I'm Marsha Cates."

Taken aback by the woman's rather fierce demeanor, Alice pulled herself together to shake her outstretched hand, "Nice to meet you, Dr. Cates—"

"No time for chit-chat," she said firmly, turning on her heel and strolling down the hallway, "Lord only knows where your new employer is, but until he gets here," she paused beside a small desk, "This is your station."

A few minutes later, after being laden with papers to file through, old documents to be typed and updated, and a threatening promise as to what would happen if it wasn't completed by closing hours, Alice sat at her new desk, which she'd taken a few minutes to dust off, buried in paperwork. She knew work as a secretary would be hard, but she wasn't expecting to be inducted into boot camp. And she still hadn't met her actual employer. She'd heard he was a bit odd, but since she kept little company, she figured she would either deal with it or ignore it, as long as the work got done.

CRASH!

She jumped, sending several pens flying everywhere. After scrambling to get them picked up, Alice leaned over her desk to peer around the corner. The door at the end of the hall, which had previously been locked tight, was open, and a mess of books and papers littered the floor. A man had fallen flat on his face and was now rubbing his injured chin. Alice scrambled to help him.

"Are you alright?" she asked, startled, "Here, let me…"

"Oh, thank you, miss," he said, blushing slightly, "Oh, dear," he flustered, seeing the disaster before him, "Clumsy me…"

"It's not so bad," Alice said, gathering the papers neatly in a pile.

"Thank you kindly, miss…" he trailed off as they finally made eye contact, "Oh, I don't believe I've seen you before," he held out a hand, "Jervis Tetch."

"Alice Pleasance," she smiled, feeling much more comfortable with this funny man than Dr. Cates. He was an older gentleman, but his bright blue eyes sparkled with life and his smile set her at ease in a strange way.

"Alice…oh dear!" he exclaimed, looking terribly nervous, "This was hardly the fashion in which I wanted our meeting, Miss Pleasance," he stammered.

"You're the one who put out the ad?" Alice asked, relieved almost instantly. For a few minutes, she worried she would be working directly for Dr. Cates.

"Well, yes, I am actually…." He said, turning bright red, "Miss Pleasance…"

"In view of my position," Alice said gently, "Perhaps you could call me…Alice?"

The red color of his face darkened to crimson, "Oh, of course…Alice."

"I'll be out here if you need me, Mr. Tetch." She smiled, bowing slightly.

"Jervis…will do just nicely." He stammered.

"Jervis," she smiled all the more before sitting back down at her desk.

* * *

Alice was distracted from her daydream by a small, warm, rough tongue on her face. "Mm…Cheshire," she giggled, rubbing behind the kitten's ears, "What time is…" she looked over at the clock, seeing that it was eight-thirty in the evening. No doubt, her pet wanted food; she scooped up the tiny ball of fur and proceeded back to the kitchen to fetch some canned dinner—probably for both her and the kitten.

* * *

A/N: This is my first Batman fanfiction that focuses solely on Alice and Jervis' relationship. Please leave a review and let me know what you think!


	2. Wishful Thinking

A/N: Sorry for the delay! Please enjoy chapter 1! Also, for those of you who haven't read my other fanfictions, Iris is my OC and is Alice's half-sister. Those of you who have been my very loyal readers, you know all about Miss DeLaine! Enjoy!  


* * *

Chapter 1: Wishful Thinking

The phone had been ringing nonstop for the past few days. What was worse, every time the voice machine picked up the call, it was Billy calling. Why her ex-fiancé insisted on calling her repeatedly even after they'd broken up, she would never understand. She used to only use those words when talking about Jervis, saying she'd never understand why he chose her. Why did she have to be the first victim? And yet…she hadn't really been a victim. There was no denying that she had been terrified when he'd kidnapped her, but truthfully, he hadn't _hurt_ her. Billy always would say that it was thanks to Batman that she hadn't been hurt, that Jervis hadn't gotten the chance to hurt her, but truthfully, she couldn't remember him so much as laying a harmful hand on her. But she did seem to recall a whisper, just before everything had gone blank,

"_Believe me, I didn't want it…this way…_"

Alice sighed heavily, resting her head against her hands. The phone rang _again_. She groaned aloud, sliding off the couch to go and grab the device. She really hoped it wasn't Billy; she wasn't in the mood to start yelling again, which, lately, had been the only thing they did when they talked anymore.

"Hello?"

"Evening, gorgeous one. Has the Queen of Diamonds chopped your head off yet?"

Alice burst out laughing. "Iris! Really, now, you shouldn't talk about Dr. Cates like that."

"Shouldn't, but I do." The familiar voice of her half-sister was soothing to hear after listening to Billy's voice continuously for the past week, "Seriously though, how is work?"

"Same as always," she answered, petting Cheshire, who'd just made himself comfortable on her foot, "How is the conference?"

"Ah yes…the glorious hell on earth that I get dragged to because my idiotic superior decided to take a _working vacation_! When I get my hands on him, I swear…"

"He'll be running for the hills, Iris, if he has any brains at all." Alice smiled, curling up with her cat back on the couch.

"Well, since he doesn't have any of those, I might actually have some fun…"

"Iris!"

"I'm kidding…kind of." Iris laughed softly, "You sound distance, Alice. What's wrong? Is the parasite asking you to take him back?"

"Yes, he has been, but I haven't answered the phone." The blonde answered, giggling as Cheshire pawed at her teasing fingers on the furry belly, "Just like you told me…"

"That's my girl," Iris sounded satisfied, "But something is still bothering you. What have I told you about keeping secrets from your big sister?"

"Secrets are for strangers, not family." Alice recited, "It's…well…you haven't heard the news, I guess."

"Sweetie, I'm in Chicago, remember?"

"Right." Alice laughed softly but still uneasily, "Well, Jervis…he's in the hospital."

"What?!" Iris asked, her easy manner vanished with the drop of a hat, so to speak, "What happened?"

"He was implanted by one of his chips…" Alice said quietly, "The Joker used them to sabotage the local comedy competition…"

"And he couldn't risk Jervis getting in his way." Iris hissed. Alice knew her sister absolutely loathed the Clown Prince of Crime, and she was surprised that something wasn't exploding in the background from Iris' fury, "That filth…is Jervis alright?"

"He's in a coma," Alice answered.

A long pause followed, broken by Iris' voice, sounding much softer and gentler, "Are you alright?"

"Hm? Of course." Alice lied, looking down at the sleeping kitten on her foot.

"Right," Iris scoffed, not fooled, "Have you considered going to see him?"

"He's in a coma," Alice said immediately, "What good would it do?"

Iris sighed, "Never mind." A muffled shout came from the background, followed by Iris' indignant reply, "I'm talking with my sister, alright?! Try taking a nice dose of patience before I give it to you with a syringe and needle, you Jurassic twit!"

She grumbled something under her breath. "I have to go, love, but I'll call later. Think about what I said, alright?"

"Okay…goodbye…" Alice said, sad that her one source of friendship had to be taken away. Cheshire was disturbed from her slumber by the sound of the phone returning to the cradle. Her tail tickled Alice's hand, but she couldn't smile. There was a time when Iris hadn't been around as a friend. And during that time…there had only been one person she could rely on…

* * *

"TETCH!"

Alice had barely had time to wince at the harsh yell emitted by Dr. Cates before she heard a loud crash from inside Jervis' office. Quickly, before their boss could appear, she hurried into his office. Jervis was sitting amongst a mess of papers, a large glass tank in his arms. If she had to guess at first glance, she would estimate that he had been startled by the yell and, in a split-second, decided to save the tank instead of the papers. Upon seeing her standing in the doorway, Jervis blushed and stood as quickly as possible.

"One of these days, I will manage to avoid you seeing me in such ridiculous predicaments…" he said, clearly embarrassed.

"It's alright," she said, "What's the tank for?"

"Some new experiments I'm attempting," he said, setting it up on the countertop, "Under the radar, of course…"

"A new proposal?" Alice asked, looking up from where she was kneeling to collect the papers.

"Well, maybe." He said, looking nervous but excited at the same time, "I'm not sure how it will…you know, play out…but still…"

"I'm sure it will, Jervis." She smiled, setting the papers down. "Oh…is that a new poster?"

He smiled broadly at the _Alice in Wonderland_ image she was pointing to. "Indeed. Have you read Lewis Carroll's work?"

"I'm afraid not." Alice answered, "I suppose it's ironic, isn't it? Considering my name and all?"

"Pish tush," he smiled gently, "But it is a magnificent work! Perhaps one day, you will read it."

"I might have to." She returned the smile.

"Tetch!"

Both employer and employee winced as Dr. Cates stormed into the office, "Bruce Wayne is coming tomorrow, so for your sake I hope you've concocted something to present to him, or heads will roll!"

As the door slammed behind her, Alice and Jervis exchanged a look of mixed fear and apprehension. "You _do_ have something, right?" she asked meekly.

The look on his face answered that question. She looked around. "Well…why don't you tell Mr. Wayne about your new proposal?"

He frowned. "I…I haven't really started with the experimentation yet…and the only _proposal_ I have is a mess of notes and hypotheses…nothing presentable."

Alice smiled gently, setting a hand on his arm. "Nonsense! You can pull something together, Jervis. I know you can. I'll even help you, if you can use my help, that is."

The corners of his mouth twitched. "Really?"

"If I can help…" she added, "I…I'm not really good with this sort of thing…"

"Oh, it's quite simple." He guided her over to a counter, "You see, I'm hoping to…"

* * *

"Alice? Alice, did you hear me?"

She jumped slightly, "Oh, I'm sorry, Dr. Cates. What is it?"

"I was just wondering if you'd heard from your sister recently." Marsha Cates asked, sitting gracefully on the edge of Alice's desk. She had taken a liking to Iris since the first time they'd met. She told Alice later that she thoroughly enjoyed Iris' no-nonsense demeanor, particularly in the "position of power" Iris held at the University. Alice personally doubted that Iris considered working for Dr. Long was a "powerful position", especially when she loathed the man, but she'd chosen to not mention this to Dr. Cates.

"Oh, yes!" Alice said, perking up at the mention of her sister. "Iris called yesterday night. She's in Chicago, at a conference for all the professors at Gotham University."

"Professors? I thought she was only an aid?" Cates asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Oh, she is. But Professor Carmen decided that he needed a…'working vacation'." Alice nearly laughed, remembering her sister's tone of voice when she discussed Carmen's actions.

"Which is sweet talk for running out on his duties." Cates sniffed, looking very disapproving, "Well, you tell your sister that she should be commended for stepping up to the plate. She's a good role model for you, isn't she?"

The tone in which she asked the question made it sound like more of a statement, but Alice nodded all the same. "Yes, she is. I'm lucky to have her."

"Oh, I think I'm going to take my lunch now." Alice said, eyeing the clock. "I'll be back."

"Take care." Cates said, waving before barking at a clerk for not working hard enough.

* * *

Alice slowly sipped her tea, glad that the little café near the office was basically empty today. She didn't have a problem being around a lot of people, but the privacy was a blessing. That and she was sure that if there was someone who attempted to strike up a conversation with her, she wouldn't be the best company.

"Penny for your thoughts?"

Alice choked on her tea, looking up in absolute shock. Keeping herself under control long enough to check and see that the coast was clear, she looked at the tall, curvaceous woman standing beside her table, wearing a simple green top and dark dress pants, her vivid red hair pulled up in a ponytail and sunglasses covering her eyes.

"Ivy, what are you doing here?" Alice whispered as her visitor slid into the vacant seat, "When did you get out of Arkham?"

"Yesterday, the rags just haven't managed to catch up yet." Poison Ivy answered, using her favorite name for the media. She crossed one leg over the other, looking supremely unconcerned that she was sitting casually in broad daylight in a public place. She leaned towards the blonde, "You look distracted, honey. Something on your mind?"

Alice swallowed. "It's…" she hadn't been able to lie to her sister, so lying to her sister's best friend (one of two) was out of the question, "It's Jervis."

Ivy nodded, an understanding smile on her lips. "Did you talk to Iris about it?"

"She wants me to go see him…but I don't know what good it would do." Alice said, looking quite depressed. In spite of herself, she almost smiled at the situation. A couple years ago, had she ever imagined that she would be sitting in a café with a legally insane criminal, chatting casually, she would have checked herself into a hospital at once.

Ivy shrugged. "You never know. He might wake up _because_ you come and see him. That is what you want, right?" she raised an eyebrow.

"For Jervis to wake up? Of course!" Alice said, a little too enthusiastically for someone who'd recently broken up with her fiancé, "Of course…I just want him to be alright."

Ivy nearly smirked, "So what are you waiting for?"

Alice sighed, "You sound like Iris, you know that?"

"Living across from her cell for two years will do that," Ivy said, standing and patting her on the back, "Harl and I are going to meet up with her in Chicago; I've got to run to the airport. We'll give you a call, alright?"

"Be careful." Alice said, managing a smile.

"Hey," Ivy winked over her sunglasses, "It's me, remember? I taught your sister the tricks of the trade."

Alice laughed softly and waved goodbye as Ivy moved outside and hailed a cab. Checking her watch, she gathered her things and headed back to the office.

* * *

Alice privately let out a sigh of relief, alone at her desk after a good few hours of paperwork mayhem. The last thing she wanted to happen was for her sister's friend to be arrested soon quickly after escaping the asylum. She knew that not reporting Ivy was a felony, but she trusted that all Ivy and Harley were doing was hopping a plane and visiting her sister in Chicago. She had no doubt that she would be getting a phone call that night from Iris, teasing her for not reporting a legally insane criminal to the police. At least that would cheer her up a bit.

"Alice, you've done enough for today," Dr. Cates said, patting her shoulder, "Why don't you go home and call your sister?"

"Thank you," Alice said, not even hiding the fact that she was happy to go home.

Sure enough, the minute she walked through the door, the phone rang. Crossing her fingers, she raced across the room to grab the phone. "Hello?"

"Why is Pamela telling me that you seem depressed?"

"Hi to you too, Iris." She said dully.

"Don't give me that. Did you lie to me yesterday?"

"No!" Alice defended, "I just didn't want to worry you…"

"Then talk to me," Iris said, "What's wron—Harley, get out of there! Don't give me that—it's not a play—"

There was a small explosion in the background, making Alice wince, her imagination going wild as to what on earth Harley did this time. A few minutes later, after being on hold and listening to muffled shouts and crashes on the other line, Alice heard Iris return to the phone, cursing under her breath.

"This is why I always rent a hotel and buy out a floor for myself…" Iris said, coughing slightly.

"Dare I ask?" Alice said, trying not to laugh.

"Harley found my…extra-curricular tools." Iris said quietly.

"Ah," Alice said, not needing to ask more, "Going to do a little night prowling, sis?"

"Just a bit. Have a little fun without the Bat on my tail."

"Iris…when are you going to be home?" Alice asked. She didn't mean to sound whiny and childish, which was precisely what she sounded like, but she missed her sister.

"In a couple days, love, don't worry." Iris said gently, "You going to be okay until then?"

"I think so…"

"Good," Iris said, "I'll call again if I'm not off killing my superior. And think about what I said, alright? See you soon."


	3. A Dancing Fairy

A/N: More updates to come, I swear!! Please review!

Disclaimer: If I owned Batman, this fic would never need to be written because Alice and Jervis would be together. Enough said.

* * *

Chapter 3: A Dancing Fairy

Alice paced around in the area, looking around almost nervously. She didn't know why she was acting like this, but she couldn't help it. She was chewing her lower lip, rubbing her hands over each other…gracious, she must look like a complete wreck of nature.

"You do know the world isn't ending today, right?"

She smiled slightly, "Are you in a better mood, Iris, or is that just a façade?"

"Do I have choice about what mood I'm in?" she said rather dryly, "Didn't know I actually had a say in the matter."

Alice frowned slightly, her smile vanishing, "Iris…don't talk like that. Grandma likes to see your smile…"

She didn't answer, just stared blankly out the window. Alice sighed. Why couldn't everyone just smile for once? She hated it when people were angry…not just at her, but angry in general. It made her feel like she was doing something useful when people smiled around her. Of course, that could just be her being conceited…but people often said it was her "magic". By people, of course, that usually was restricted to just Iris, and Harley and Ivy. She had been nothing short of petrified when Iris had introduced her to the two female Rouges, but they were nothing like the media classified them. If anything…they were just a pair of best friends…who bickered…a lot.

"We're here, madam…" the driver said, pulling up into a long, winding driveway that led up to a mansion on the outskirts of London. Alice looked out the window in awe.

"Isn't it stunning, Iris?" she breathed.

Iris nodded, "Always has been…"

The blonde frowned and fell silent. Iris seemed to notice her silence, because she reached out and touched her shoulder, "Hey, where's that smile?"

"Where's _your_ smile?" Alice replied, raising an eyebrow slightly.

Iris blinked in surprise, then a true smile curved her lip, "Touché…"

Alice's smile returned as well. "What's Grandma Sylvia like?" she asked, leaning back in the seat.

"She was a dancer when she was younger," Iris answered, still smiling, "She danced for the Russian ballet for years, and then she just danced in shows for the fun of it."

Alice's smile widened, "Really?"

Iris nodded, "She's beautiful….Grandfather was a lucky man…"

The car stopped outside the house. Alice was out first, staring up in wonder. The house was entirely built from some sort of stone, one that looked like rose-colored marble. Each room had a massive balcony, complete with curtains covering the entry. The front doors were a set of handsome double doors, carved from rosewood and trimmed with gold ornaments. A man dressed in a suit, complete with a black frock coat, bowed low and opened the doors for them before going to help the driver fetch the luggage. Alice could hear her breath echoing throughout the foyer; her eyes followed the great, winding staircase all the way to the dome-shaped rooftop.

"Grandma?" Iris called out, "Grandma Sylvia?"

"Is that my granddaughters?"

Both girls looked up, "Hi, Grandma!" Alice called out.

A woman, tall and slender like her eldest granddaughter, walked down the winding staircase to the ground floor. As she arrived, one had a much clearer view of her figure. She had soft silver hair, drawn up in a stunning up-do; her dress was made of emerald satin, trimmed with white lace. She held an ivory cane in her hand, the nails long but manicured. Her face held age, but hardly any wrinkles, save the defined ones around her lips and eyes. She smiled and wrapped her granddaughters in a hug.

"Your rooms are upstairs, dears…Charles will show you up. Dinner will be at six o'clock, ladies."

Iris and Alice led the way, Alice staring in wonder at the beauty around her. She was so busy looking around, she didn't even notice when they had arrived at her room. Blushing slightly from embarrassment, she went inside, letting Cheshire loose. The black ball of fur bounced around, exploring everywhere. She had to smile at the kitten's enthusiasm. With a sigh, she sat down on the bed, looking around. The bed was covered with sapphire blue covers, including a dark blue canopy draping overhead. The curtains were the same color as her bed covers, leading out onto the balcony. There was a vanity on the opposite wall that looked as though it had come out of an old Victorian house, with a matching wardrobe beside it.

Cheshire was bounding all over the room, tail frisking to and fro, occasionally stopping to examine something. She smiled slightly; with a sigh, she decided it would be best to change into suitable clothes for dinner. Moving over to her suitcase, the first thing she noticed was a box about the size of a shoe box, what she called her "memory box". She must have packed it with the idea of going through it later. Setting it on the bed, she went back over the wardrobe and opened the doors. Her grandmother always had a colorful selection of clothes for them. As she finished dressing, there was a knock at the door. Charles stood outside, waiting for her.

"Dinner is served, Miss Pleasance." He said, bowing low.

* * *

Alice felt small and out of place at this long table. The dress she had selected was simple, colored bright purple with white trim on the straps and hem; her hair was pulled back in a half-ponytail. Sylvia DeLaine sat at the head of the table, calmly sipping her soup. Iris sat beside Alice; she hadn't changed her clothes, something which her grandmother didn't seem to mind.

"You both have been awfully quiet," Marcus said, wiping his mouth, "Where's the happy chatter you two always give?"

"Leave the girls be, Marcus," Sylvia said calmly, "They're tired from the flight and ridiculous drive here, that's all. Are you both finished eating?"

Both nodded mutely, "Very well. Then off to bed, darlings."

They murmured their goodnights and walked back up the stairs. Iris looked over at Alice, "What's wrong?"

"Nothing," she said softly.

Iris frowned, "Alice…"

"Honest, it's nothing. I'll be alright, Iris…" she smiled, "Just need to sleep, that's all…I'll see you in the morning."

Her sister frowned but bade her goodnight and walked down to her own room. Once she was alone, Alice closed the door and went to change into a nightgown. As she pulled her other dress off the bed to place in the laundry, the memory box toppled over on its side, the contents slipping out. She winced and rushed over, only now realizing she'd forgotten to put the latch back on it. She sighed as she placed everything back in the box: a few rare coins from her father on his travels…some collectibles from her own travels (few as they were)…photos of her and Iris…some other photos…and a figurine.

Her hand paused at the figurine…there was something familiar about it…she looked it over, holding it in one hand. It was a statue of a fairy, wearing a pale blue gown that fluttered and flowed about her in an unseen wind; her blonde hair flowed around her waist in feathery tresses, swirling around her pale wings as she danced upon a lake, her bare feet making ripples. The detail was so amazing…stunning. Suddenly, the memory clicked. She knew exactly where she'd gotten this…

* * *

"Happy Birthday, Alice…" she whispered aloud to herself, tracing the phone cord with a finger to keep herself from crying. How hard was it for Billy to say those words? It was only three words, which meant it only took a few seconds to say…but apparently three words was too much trouble for him. She sniffed slightly and resumed her drawings. She knew she already had drawn enough, but it was something to distract her.

"Alice?"

She started and looked up, "Oh, Jervis…I'm sorry, I didn't see you…"

"Are you alright?" he asked, frowning slightly at her reddening eyes.

"I'm fine," she assured him, "Just…"

"What?" he asked, setting a hand to her shoulder gently.

She smiled slightly, "Billy….I think he forgot my birthday," she said softly, sniffing again.

His concerned smile went to a frown and back to a concerned expression, "Oh, Alice…I'm sorry…" he murmured.

"It's okay…" she said, pulling herself together, "I'll live…"

He reached inside his pocket, "Um…well, it's not much but…"

She looked at him curiously. "It's really just a trifle, but…well, will this do?" he opened his palm, revealing a tiny figurine of a blonde fairy. Her eyes widened.

"Jervis…you remembered my birthday?" she whispered. He must have…people didn't just go walking around with such things in their pockets. He blushed and nodded, clearly unsure of what to say. She took it in her hand, examining it carefully.

"Jervis..this is wonderful." She crossed around the desk to hug him tightly, "This is beautiful...thank you, thank you…."

"Happy Birthday, Alice," he said with a shy and gentle smile, "May you have many more to come."

She hugged him again, "You don't know what this means to me, Jervis…you're a terrific friend."

* * *

The statue felt suddenly warm in her hands, making her realize how cold her body had become. The figurine was smiling…smiling like there wasn't a care in the world. She used to smile like that…she used to always have that smile. No matter how upset she was, with her mother or Billy or anyone else, she could always put that gentle, carefree smile on her face, because she knew Jervis needed to see it. And every time she smiled for him, he would smile in return. He never thought much of his smile, but it was always a comfort to her, knowing and feeling that she was making at least one person happy.

_You did more than that though, didn't you, Alice?_

She paused. She always hated it when that little voice in the back of her head mentioned those things…truth that she didn't want to face; truth that needed to be understood and accepted, despite her trying to run from it.

She dropped back on the bed covers, staring up the canopy cover. With a quiet sigh, she rolled over and let her exhaustion take over. She didn't even notice the figurine was still in her hand.


	4. Broken Record

Chapter 4 - Broken Record

"Alice! Alice, come down here, child."

Marcus' voice rang and echoed throughout the upper hallway, "Quickly, Alice, your mother has finally arrived!"

The blonde sighed heavily. Just what she needed, Mother dearest to come and tell her all about how disappointed she was that her daughter wasn't still with "good money". God forbid, she should actually try and make a decision for herself once in a while…no, we can't have that. Mother has to make all the decisions…_And make sure you call me Mother! None of this "Mum" or "Mommy" nonsense. Your future husband will think you're a toddler...and sit up, for God's sake, child!_

A knock at the door interrupted Alice's less-than-gentle thoughts. "Come in," she said, still brushing out her hair.

She looked in the mirror to see her visitor, and a smile curved her mouth. "Thank god it's you…I thought Mother had decided to come up and get me herself."

"Trust me, darling sister," Iris said, sliding onto the edge of the vanity, "If I was Mummy dearest, I wouldn't have taken the courtesy to knock."

"Come now, Iris…" Sylvia said, gliding into the room, "Show Sarah some respect."

Iris frowned slightly, "I don't show respect to those who don't deserve it."

"Behave, child…" Sylvia said gently, patting her eldest grandchild on the head lightly, "You'll have plenty of time to criticize her after she leaves. Remember, she's only staying for a week."

"It'll be the longest week of my life…" Alice said with a heavy sigh. Iris patted her shoulder gently; Sylvia sighed quietly.

"Come along, girls…let get you both dressed for dinner."

"Let me guess…we're going out," Iris said, looking less than pleased.

"It's the place where your father and Sophia first met…" Sylvia nodded, moving to the closet. Alice frowned at Iris' smirk.

"Want to bet it's where you were conceived, little sister?"

* * *

"I'm so glad to be back here," Sophia Pleasance said, taking Marcus' hand with a sweet smile on her face, "Thank you so kindly for inviting me, Sylvia."

"Certainly…." Sylvia answered, her smile rather forced and tight.

"And thank goodness you were here to help Alice," she said, sipping tea, "God knows the child isn't quite up to date in the fashion industry. I buy her all that I can, but she refuses to wear…she wants to wear things that are simply not appropriate. I know it's not her fault though…all just to fit in with the girls at school, isn't it, Alice darling?"

"Yes, Mother…" Alice said quietly, staring down at her plate.

"Oh, how well I remember this place…don't you, Marcus?" she purred, curling her arm around his with a smile.

"Indeed I do, Sophia…" he smiled in return.

"You should be grateful to this place, Alice," she said briskly, "Or else you would never have been born."

"Yes, Mother,"

"Oh, and that reminds me," she said, looking as though she didn't even notice her daughter looked tired and frustrated, "I've been in contact with Mrs. Travis…she says that Billy holds absolutely no ill feelings toward you for that unfortunate incident a few months ago. He's assured me you were simply tired and feeling not quite yourself. You must have been, of course."

"What do you mean, Sophia?" Sylvia asked softly.

"Well, that's the only way she would have been so adamant about defending that criminal…not that it's talk over lunch. Alice and I will discuss it later at home, won't we, darling?"

"Yes, Mother,"

"And you won't be too tired to talk to your mother, will you?"

"No, Mother,"

"You promise, sweetheart?"

"Yes, Mother,"

"Oh…" she pulled her daughter into a tight, one-armed hug, "You're such an angel, aren't you, Alice?"

"Yes, Mother,"

_CRACK!_

All eyes turned to Iris, who was now sitting with a pool of water and shards of a broken glass surrounding her, some shards sticking out of her hand. Alice gasped softly, "Oh, Iris…let's go to get this cleaned up."

"Thank you, Alice…" she said softly, wrapping a napkin around her wounded hand before walking away with her sister. Sophia clucked her tongue, shaking her head at Marcus.

"I worry about that child of yours, Marcus…"

* * *

"The next time you want to get me out of a conversation, Iris," Alice said, shaking her head, "Just ask to go to the bathroom, okay? You already have _enough_ scars on your body to last a lifetime."

The cold silence made the blonde frown and look up, only to step back at the frigid look in Iris' eyes, "What?" she asked, stunned and slightly.

"_Yes, Mother_…._No, Mother_…._Won't happen again, Mother_…" she glared at the blonde, "Do you have _any_ idea how much your sound like a broken record?!"

Alice's eyes were wide with mingled fear and shock. If she'd thought Iris' eyes had been cold, it was nothing compared to the wintry disapproval of her voice. "Iris…she's my mother."

"Mother? She's more of a damn tyrant than anything! What happened to all the lessons I've been giving you—teaching you to have an original thought, for example?!"

Alice physically took three steps back from her smoldering sister, stunned beyond words, "Iris…" she didn't know how to deal with Iris when she was like this.

"You know exactly what that conversation tonight is going to entail, don't you?" Iris continued, advancing towards her, "She's going to rant on and on and on and on and on about how you were irresponsible to break up with that idiotic _boy_ and how you've clearly been manipulated by that freak of nature again…"

"Stop…please…" she whimpered, but Iris paid her no mind.

"And then she'll rant on for an hour about how you have to move on after what the freak did to you…how it's your _responsibility_ as a member of this family to pick yourself up and marry a suitable man who will give you a nice house and make your Mummy nice and rich…"

"Iris…please…" she begged.

"Which, of course, is why Travis is such an excellent choice. He comes from a nice, fat wallet, and he's every girl's _dream_, isn't he, sister dear? Tall, rugged, handsome, and rich—what more could a sweet little naïve girl ask for ?!"

"STOP!" she burst out, nearly in tears, "Why are you doing this? Why are you saying those awful thing?!"

"Because the man you worked for…the man you claimed to be your friend…he is that _freak_, Alice!! And now he's lying back in Gotham's Medical Center, and they don't think he'll ever wake up! The man you KISSED!!!"

"I know!" she said furiously, "But she's my mother, Iris—my MOTHER!!"

"That doesn't have anything to do with—"

"Just because you have no respect for your mother doesn't mean you can dictate whether or not I have respect for mine!!"

Iris froze, looking as though she'd been slapped. "I…I see…" she said softly. But there was something different about her voice this time…it sounded stunned…but more than that, it sounded broken. Alice bit her lip slightly, her eyes falling downward.

"Iris…I didn't…"

When she looked back up, Iris was gone.


	5. Remember

A/N: Probably is time for a disclaimer: I do NOT own Batman...........

* * *

Chapter 5: Remember

Alice sat on her bed, dressed in her night gown, staring in the bed covers, her arms wrapped tightly around her knees, which were pulled up to her chin. Her eyes burned, like she wanted to cry, but she was certain that after all the crying she'd been doing during the last hour, there were no more tears to come. She had only escaped the talk with her mother because Grandma Sylvia had stepped in, telling Mother to give her some peace and quiet.

But she didn't want peace. And she didn't want quiet.

She couldn't believe what she had said to Iris…to her _sister_. The girl who had been her best and closest friend for two years before they had finally realized they were related…the girl who had been with her and held her the entire night after she broke up with Billy…the person to whom she had joyfully announced that she had kissed Jervis…her friend…her confident…her sister….her sister…..

_Jervis_…

She dropped back lifelessly onto the bed, staring up blankly, her eyes staring well past the canopy and ceiling, back to Gotham. Her throat hurt, her head hurt…everything hurt right now…

"_The man you worked for…the man you claimed to be your friend…he is that freak, Alice!! And now he's lying back in Gotham's Medical Center, and they don't think he'll ever wake up! The man you KISSED!!!_"

Yes…yes she did kiss him. Just as he had kissed her the night everything had gone wrong. She squeezed her eyes shut tight…too tight. She was seeing black, then stars…then white…and it hurt…badly. Her eyes flew open as something brushed past her bare foot.

"Cheshire…you scared me." She said, shaking her head.

The black kitten gave a soft _mew_ and plopped into her lap. The golden eyes gazed up at her, questioning and lovable all at once. She bit her lip hard, only to wince as she felt the skin break and a thin trickle of blood seep out. She raised a hand to wipe it away.

Her lips were tingling.

They had only tingled like this once before…only once…

"Alice?"

She sighed heavily, looking at the door, "Yes, Father?"

He shook his head as he walked in, "None of that Father nonsense, dear, just call me Dad."

She smiled slightly, "Okay, Dad…"

"What happened with Iris? You two didn't speak all the way home, and she hasn't come out of her room for hours. You two didn't even come to dinner."

"It's nothing, Dad," she said calmly, "We're both just tired…didn't get a lot of sleep last night…"

He nodded, hand reaching up to pat her head gently. She knew it was meant to be a gentle and loving touch; it made her feel like an obedient dog. "Alright, Alice…get some sleep then."

"Good night, Dad…" she said softly, her eyes falling back to the covers as the door closed behind him.

Cheshire nuzzled her palm, arching and rubbing against it. She smiled, only to notice her lips were tingling again. Why was her mind so bent on making her remember things that had no place in her memory right now? She knew exactly why her mother was here, and why she had brought up Billy over lunch. She was here to get Alice married off again, and quickly. She didn't know why she was so eager to marry her daughter into money…unless she was worried all the inheritance would go to Iris. Yes, that must have been it. To ensure she was able to retire comfortably, Mother was trying to get Alice married into money…and into a relationship with someone she really had no interest in seeing right now. She had broken up with Billy for a reason…but now that reason was gone. Maybe it would be better to just do as she was told, like a good little girl. She had always done that in the past, and things hadn't turned out horribly…had they?

Her lips were tingling to the point where they could no longer be ignored. Her eyes slowly closed as memories swept forward, now that they had been permitted to invade her mind and bring her back to a night…

* * *

"_Here you are, Alice…" the soft murmur spoke in her ear, the same as it had been whenever her employer spoke to her that night. She felt his arms around her, gently guiding her to sit in a chair. It was a high-backed, throne-like chair, just like the one Alice sat in at the Mad Hatter's tea party. No, she hadn't read the book, but Jervis talked about it enough, and the poster in his office was a perfect illustration…at least the designers of this park got their facts straight._

_He gently set her on the seat; his fingers lightly brushed aside a few loose strands of her hair that she was unable to fix herself. Though she could not show it, she felt safe…ironic as it was, she felt completely safe right now. No, she was unable to do anything or act like a normal person, only sit there and obey like a little doll, but she was not one of those dolls that is played with for hours on end, and then tossed away on the shelf, unwanted and unneeded. Since he had carried her out into the park, Jervis had done nothing but treat her like a queen. A small, more morally based part of her clouded mind was trying to remind her that he had kidnapped her from her home, and Lord only knew what he had done with Billy…and yet…he hadn't hurt her at all. He'd let her dress herself, and there was nothing truly scandalous about her outfit…though it was a touch childish…_

_She gave a mental jerk as she felt his hand touch hers, only briefly, before he pulled it away again, looking slightly ashamed. She tried to move her hand, but while the intention and attempt was there, the action was non-existent. She now knew exactly what he'd been working on for all these months…technology to gain complete and total control over a person's mind. Was that how he had arranged for last night? This was wrong…God, it was all so wrong…_

_But he did it for you._

_The aching lump in her throat was horribly painful right now, no doubt built up from the tears she was longing to cry. Everything he had done was completely and totally illegal…even insane…but he'd done it for her. Perhaps not the simplest means to impress her, but that's all he had wanted to do, wasn't it? And he hadn't been boasting while they were out together…but Billy had. He always seemed to have to make a show about things whenever they were out, but Jervis had been a complete gentleman. Opened doors for her, pulled out her seat for her to sit down, bowed, held her hand only occasionally…and he'd danced with her. And it wasn't with anyone around…only the two of them…dancing together…._

"_Alice…"_

_Her eyes stared straight ahead, though her attention was once again on him. He had removed his hat, and was currently sitting beside her on the table. She could feel his eyes on her…the longing and desire was radiating off him…oh, God in heaven, why hadn't she seen this before? Why hadn't he told her before? He swore he would never hide anything from her…the lump grew more…he promised…he promised he would never…_

_All thoughts stopped in her head as his lips pressed against hers. It was nothing like a kiss she had ever felt before…timid and unsure…even hesitant, like he felt he was breaking some written-in-stone law by kissing her. But, she couldn't deny…it felt…nice. Her free will was all but gone, but she knew there was still some left in her. Her lips parted slightly as she managed to return the kiss. She had never dreamt a kiss could be like this. Fearful and wonderful all in one…a strange sensation that, in this moment, could only be described as heavenly. Oh, she had never dreamed it would be like this…_

_And just as quickly as it had begun, it was all over. The kiss had been broken, and now she was staring at her very shame-faced employer. He swallowed hard, then picked up the axe he had grabbed when they first entered the maze. With his free hand, he set his hat back on top of his head. His soft blue eyes darted back to Alice, who could do nothing but stare. His fingertips reached out to touch her lips gently._

"_You won't remember this…" he whispered softly, "Not the way I want you to…"_

_She wanted nothing more than to grab his hand, tell him she did remember. But she was helpless and motionless. Tears pricked the corners of his eyes as he moved back towards the maze. She could still make out the words that left his lips before they took flight to the night wind._

"_I love you, my sweet, angel…my Alice…and you'll never remember…"_

* * *

Her eyes opened again, returning herself not to the Wonderland Park, but her room. She was not dressed in the purple dress of Alice in Wonderland, but her own pale blue nightgown. She touched her face with trembling fingertips, feeling the tear tracks soaking down her face. Cheshire was pawing at her, trying to understand why she was crying, uncontrollably and silently. She tried to smile to assure her pet, but she only sobbed again. Cheshire hurried into her lap, nuzzling and cuddling her. She held the tiny ball of black fur close, crying and crying into the fur. She swallowed hard, wiping her eyes, only for more tears to come.

"Jervis…" she whispered aloud, "I did remember….I did…"


	6. We're All Mad Here

A/N: I would just like to dedicate this chapter to my friend Mad Maiden. Thank you for being one of my best reviewers as well as a great and wondrous source of inspiration! Keep writing, my friend!

* * *

Chapter 6: We're All Mad Here

"Now, Alice, hold still…" Sophia said, shaking her head, "We can't fit your dress properly if you insist on shaking yourself around like that."

"Yes, Mother…" she had to force the words out of her mouth. Iris was right, she really did sound like a…

_Iris_…

She bit her lip slightly. She still hadn't spoken to her sister, and it had been the better part of a week. Come to think of it, she hadn't seen her sister at all…not when the family went out, not at mealtimes…not at all. All she knew was that Iris was locked up in her room…and she wasn't sure if she'd even eaten.

"Alice, do stop slouching!" her mother's voice cut through her thoughts, "Gracious, child, you'll be a hunchback by thirty!"

She straightened up a bit, frowning as the seamstress tightened the bodice far too much, "Is that…" she coughed softly, "Necessary?"

"Don't be ridiculous, darling." Sophia laughed aloud, "We must look our best!"

"Mother…I look fine. I've been losing weight by the month…" that part was quite true, in fact. Thanks to Iris' new diet, she had been shedding pounds quickly and healthy. She was quite pleased with the way she looked, but apparently, she was still lacking in her mother's eyes.

"Oh of course, you have been, love…" she crooned, patting Alice's cheek, "But a little more never hurt, now did it?"

She swallowed hard and remained silent, which her mother took as a sign of agreement. "Now then….you all can hold this for the wedding, right?"

"Certainly, ma'am," the seamstress nodded, "When will the wedding be, do you know?"

"We haven't…" Alice began, only to be cut off abruptly.

"In one month."

"One month?" Alice nearly choked on the words, "Mother, you can't be serious!"

"Of course, I'm serious!" she said with a smile, "Don't be ridiculous, child…you're starting over here in England. One month is quite a generous amount of time to allow for you two to start making wedding arrangements."

_More like you making the arrangements…_ Alice thought bitterly, "Of course…Mother…"

* * *

"Which color, Marcus?" Sophia asked, holding up two napkins, "Cream or eggshell?"

"Whichever you prefer, dear," he said from behind the paper. Alice sighed, shaking her head as she tried to read her book. Her attempts to remain unnoticed failed as her mother caught sight of the book's title.  
"Alice!" she said sharply, "What are you doing with that book?"

"Reading," she said quietly. Her patience was wearing very, very, very thin right now, and her mother's attitude wasn't helping in the slightest.

"Don't talk smart with me," Sophia said shortly, "Why are you reading that trash?"

"It's not trash!" she said, hurt and angered, "Lewis Carroll is an author, not gutter trash, Mother."

"I should have thought after that _horrible_ mess with that freak of nature, the last thing you would want to read is that wretched book." She said with a disapproving sniff.

"I enjoy the books," she said, her fingers tightening slightly on the cover, her voice and expression rather stiff.

"I said to put it away. Now do it."

Alice swallowed, "I'd rather not, Mother." She whispered.

"Did you say something?" her mother asked in that tight, thin voice that usually was the prelude to screaming.

Alice bit her lip slightly, "I said, I'd rather not." She repeated.

Marcus lowered the paper, "Sophia, if she wants to read the book, let her. No harm in it. I read the books, and I turned out just fine."

The tightness melted at once, replaced by that sugary-sweetness that made Alice feel nauseous, "Of course, love…" she crooned to Marcus, kissing his cheek, "Never mind, Alice…"

She took a deep breath, "I…I think I should sleep now. I feel tired."

"Of course, of course!" Sophia nodded, "Run along, dear. You've had a long, long day…you need your rest."

Alice turned away, _yes…I've had a long day thanks to you._

* * *

Cheshire bounded off the bed to greet her, the tiny tail swooshing back and forth with eagerness. She tried to smile for her pet, but her smile didn't stay long. Cheshire gave a soft mew, nuzzling her face once in her arms, trying to get that smile back. Alice sighed, stroking the black fur. "Sometimes, I swear you could understand me…" she murmured, "If only that were really true…"

Cheshire made a soft purr, arching against her hand. She sat down on her bed, still holding the kitten. Her eyes drifted over to her book. Once again, it stirred a memory…a memory that really wasn't wanted right now…but maybe some things needed to be remembered, for reasons which were well beyond her comprehension right now.

* * *

"_Jervis?" Alice called, stepping inside the office, "Jervis, are you here?"_

_BONK!_

_She jumped, looking around to see her employer shuffling out from under his desk, clutching his head, "Jabberwock…" he groaned, rubbing his head tenderly._

_She stifled a small smile, kneeling beside him to gently pull him into a standing position, "I'm sorry….I should have knocked…"_

"_Quite alright…" he murmured, wincing slightly, "Now…what brings you here, my dear?"_

"_I…" for some reason, she looked slightly nervous, "I was wondering…what are you doing for lunch?"_

_He blinked. He usually spent lunch periods locked in his office with his rats…drinking tea. "Oh…nothing much,"_

"_Great!" she said with a smile that stunned him, "Would you…like to go to lunch?"_

_His jaw nearly dropped to the floor, "Me…you…lunch…together?"_

"_Yes," she said with a smile, "I found a little place down the street…it serves amazing tea, Jervis. They even serve your favorite English brand!"_

"_You know my favorite tea?" he asked._

_She nodded, "Mm hm…and I know that you only like a touch of cream in it, no more."_

_Before he could answer, her hand had grabbed his and was pulling him out the door, "Come on, slowpoke. We want to beat lunch hour traffic, or we'll never get served!"_

"_How is that new proposal coming, Jervis?" she asked, sipping her lemonade, "You've been working on it for quite some time now…you must be making some progress on it."_

"_Alas, technology has a sense of humor…" Jervis said, taking a drink of tea, "There are several technicalities still to be set in order."_

_Alice giggled slightly, "I see…" she always had to smile at the way he talked. She could only assume it came from all the Lewis Carroll he read._

_He seemed to be more at ease with her laughter. "You were quite right, Alice…this is a cozy little place…"_

"_I knew you'd like it." She smiled at him, "I have something for you…"_

_He looked at her curiously, "Hm?"_

_She reached into her bag, pulling out a package wrapped in bright blue and green paper, tied with a green ribbon. He cocked his head, "Curiouser…and curiouser…" he murmured, looking at it._

_She smiled, "Don't tell me Mr. Tetch has been so busy he forgot his own birthday…" she teased._

_He blushed slightly, "Alice…this really is unnecessary…"_

"_Nonsense," she said, pushing it towards him, "Open it."_

_He slowly untied the ribbon and removed the paper, only to have his jaw drop slightly and his eyes widen at the uncovered gift. "Alice…this is…"_

"_I figured as long as you had the poster…" she smiled gently, "You ought to have the matching book."_

_His fingers slowly ran over the cover, tracing the letters _Alice in Wonderland_. "This is…I don't know what to say."_

_She smiled, "You don't have to say anything…" she assured him, "Happy Birthday, Jervis…" she said gently._

_He looked at her, smiling with what looked like tears brimming in his eyes, "Thank you, Alice…"_

"_Jervis," Alice said as they walked back to the office, "Can I ask you something?"_

"_Certainly," he said cheerfully, "I shall assume the role of the Cheshire Cat if it would so please you." He demonstrated with a big grin._

_She giggled, "As you wish…" she smiled, still giggling, "Can you…make me a promise?"_

"_Hm…" he pretended to think, "Well…perhaps if I was aware of what I would be promising to…"_

_She smiled, "Can you promise that…no matter what, you'll never lie to me? That we can always be honest with each other?"_

_He paused, "An odd request, my dear…why such a question you ask?"_

"_You're the first and best friend I've ever had…" she said softly, pausing in her walk to look at him better, "I…I want to know that I can trust you, Jervis…please?" she held out her hand, "Promise me?"_

_His hand slowly took hers, gently, "I promise."_

_

* * *

_

I promise…

Alice wiped her eyes. "I trusted you…" she whispered softly, "I trusted you…you were my friend…my only friend…and you…"

_Gave you the best night of your life, didn't he?_

She paused at the tiny voice that just spoke to her. A lump rose in her throat, knowing those words where anything but a lie. That night…it had been so…it was everything she'd ever imagined. All that she could ever have asked for in a date, he had provided. But at the end of it all, he still couldn't tell her…he'd still broken his promise…

She stared up at the ceiling, Cheshire sleeping calmly in her lap. She wasn't crying anymore. Something had suddenly broken in her as her eyes returned to the book lying on her nightstand. She felt as though all had suddenly been made clear, or at least as clear as it would get for now. She stood up, Cheshire following her sleepily. She walked down the hallway, her bare feet gently padding on the floor. Finally, she reached the room at the very end of the hallway. Her hand rose up to knock on the door twice.

It opened to reveal Iris. Her hair hung down her back, wet from a recent shower. She was wearing a black camisole and mini-shorts. Her blue eyes surveyed her sister in mingled surprise and anticipation.

"What is it?" she said softly, leaning against the doorframe.

Before she could answer, something else seeped into her memory. She nearly smiled at this memory…very nearly smiled…

* * *

"_Will you, won't you, will you, won't you," she recited with a lovely, playful smile on her face, "Won't you join the dance?"_

_Her hands were reaching for him, her arms open for him. Hardly believing it to be true, he took her hands in his own. She wrapped one arm around her waist, setting her left hand on his shoulder, holding his other hand in her right. With permission from the look in her eyes, he twirled her around the kitchen, into the living room, eyes never leaving her face._

"_Jervis,"_

_He looked down at Alice's whisper. The most beautiful smile rested upon her lips, reflected in her shining eyes. Her arms were around his neck, their faces not even a foot apart. No thought needed, Jervis merely leaned forward, and she did the same. They remained apart for a breath of a moment, and their mouths met._

* * *

"Alice?"

She stirred from the memory, looking at her sister. Iris' blue eyes were clouded with confusion. "Alice…what are you doing?"

She knew her answer before it ever left her lips. She smiled; it was a smile that only had ever been on Iris' face before now—a calm yet witty smile. She watched the surprise show in her sister's eyes as her trademark smile appeared on Alice's face.

"What…are you doing?" she repeated slowly.

"I can't explain myself," she said, smiling all the while, "Because…I'm not myself, you see."

Iris stared at her in wonder and shock. Then, that smile that Alice loved so much appeared on her face. It was a gentle and wondrous smile that only was directed at the Rouges. And Alice finally got to have it shone upon her.

"Such a curious thing…" she murmured, "One might question your sanity with such a remark."

"That can't be helped," Alice answered, "I'm mad, you're mad….we're all mad here."

* * *

A/N: Of course, you all should recognize the quotes from the great Lewis Carroll! Also, the last flashback was from my first Batman: tas fic, "A New Kind of Darkness", chapter entitled "Reunion". Please give me a great review and I am taking ideas!


	7. Paths to Make, Roads to Take

A/N: For continuous support and friendship that is nothing short of a blessing, I dedicate this chapter to Madam Pegasus. Thank you!

* * *

Chapter 7: Paths to Make, Roads to Take

Alice closed her eyes, sinking deeper into the depths of the warm bath she was currently soaking in. Her blonde hair drifted calmly on the water's surface as she sunk down to the base of her chin. She looked around; steam was fogging up the details of the bathroom, but she could still discern certain shapes and colors. The bathroom was covered from ceiling to floor in bright blue tile, giving one the feeling of being underwater, gliding through an endless sea kingdom. It was relaxing…almost like being in Wonderland…

A few minutes later, Alice emerged from the bathroom, rubbing her wet hair with a fluffy white towel, wearing a floor length, pale violet nightdress. She folded the towel up and set it down on a chair, her eyes traveling to her sister. Iris was stretched out on the bed, reading _Legend of Sleepy Hollow_, wearing her shorts and camisole. Her eyes drifted to the blonde; smiling, she closed her book and took her brush from the night stand, beckoning to Alice. She smiled and crawled onto the bed beside Iris. Her eyes closed as the brush slowly and tenderly made its way through her hair.

"I'm sorry…" she whispered aloud.

"Alice…there isn't anything to apologize for…" Iris said gently, "I know I push hard often…too hard."

"Maybe so, but you were right…" she said softly, "I thought I was doing the best thing by being a good little girl and dutiful daughter…but you were right. All I was being was a broken record…a robot whose buttons she can push and tweak whenever she wants."

Iris stopped brushing her hair; her fingers began to weave through the wet blonde strands, crafting the hair into a braid. "At least you understand that…"

She looked at her sister through the corner of her eye. She could tell there was more to what Iris wanted to say just by her tone. However, she had to wait until she was done braiding. After a couple minutes, she felt the older woman's fingers leave her hair. Slowly, she turned around to look into her sister's eyes.

"Iris? What is it?" she looked up at her.

Her blue eyes slowly met her sister's, "Alice…" she said softly, swallowing hard, "You're my sister, and that's all that matters. I have never been as happy as I was when I found out we were sisters…I love you more than you'll ever know. I can't bear the thought of you…wasting away the rest of your life with that boy…"

Alice bit her lip, "I know…" she said slowly, "But…Iris, I have no choice."

"Yes, you do." Iris said softly.

"Iris…he's in a coma…he might never wake up…" she was silenced as her sister's finger fell over her lips.

"You never know until you try."

Alice shook her head, "It's very kind, Iris…but I don't believe there is an atom of meaning in that."

Iris shook her head in turn, "I speak the truth and nothing less than the truth itself, Alice…"

Alice looked at her, "Iris…I can't…I just can't…this is our life now. We have to make the best of it. Because honestly…" she bit her lip, "I wouldn't know what path to take by myself…"

Iris opened her mouth, only to be interrupted by a soft knock at the door.

"Glad to see you both have…as you Americans say, made up," Sylvia said, stepping inside gracefully. She was dressed in her nightgown—a pale green dress with loose ties running up the back; the skirt trailed slightly on the ground. Her hair fell to her waist in a shower of silver curls.

Iris smiled slightly; Alice nodded and motioned for her grandmother to sit on the bed with them. She did so, smiling and stroking Cheshire, who eagerly came up to make quick friends.

"Such soft fur…" she commented, "And so friendly…a she, no?"

"Cheshire…" Alice nodded, "I named her after the Cheshire Cat…"

"Ah…a fellow Lewis Carroll reader…." Sylvia smiled happily, "I thought I was alone in this family….your father never truly got into the stories…"

Iris smiled slightly, "That explains why he never wanted me to read them…"

"He is fool," Sylvia said, though she was smiling, "Master Carroll holds a great many lessons for his readers, whether they know of his lessons or not…"

Alice smiled, "I know someone who would agree with you…" she said softly.

"Ah…perhaps your American friend, the Mad Hatter?"

Alice nodded, not surprised her grandmother knew of him, "Yes…he had always loved Carroll…ever since I met him."

"You worked for him, no?"

"Yes, Grandma…" she nodded slowly.

"He was good employer?"

Alice paused, "Yes…why do you ask?"

"I want to get truth from my granddaughter, not wretched media who twist truth and manipulate fact." She answered calmly, "So…what was this man like to you?"

Alice's eyes inadvertently traveled over to Iris, who merely smiled slightly. She took a breath, "He…he wasn't just my boss. He was my friend…my closest…dearest friend. He kept to himself when I first met him…but then…I tried to get to know him…and he found out he wasn't as odd as everyone said he was. Yes, he was a bit…different…he was always quoting Carroll…and often, what he would say about his technology would go a bit over my head…but he was so gentle…and he had such a love for what he did." She smiled, staring at the blankets, "I've never met anyone who was so passionate about what he did…about life…as he was. I miss him…" her throat began to hurt, "I miss him so much…."

She felt an arm around her; her head fell against Iris' shoulder while her sister stroked her hair gently and slowly. Sylvia watched in silence for a moment.

"Alice…I think you two ought to spend day together tomorrow, no? Be good for both of you…get you out of this house, anyway…"

Both girls smiled. "Thanks, Grandma…" Iris said softly.

Sylvia nodded and stood up, "Sleep well, tonight, my precious darlings…"

* * *

The door fell closed softly behind her. Alice sighed, "Iris…what was it you were saying earlier?"

"It's nothing…." Iris said, looking away.

She frowned, "Iris…come on, don't be like that…what is it? You were going to tell me something, now what was it?"

She shook her head, "It was nothing…I just don't like you saying that you don't have a choice but to marry that…_boy_."

Alice frowned, "What do you mean?"

Iris sighed, "You don't deserve a boy…you deserve a man, Alice. Nothing less than a man who can take care of you…"

"Billy _can_ take care of me," Alice protested softly, "He comes from good money…a good family…he can provide for me…"

"Just like he can provide for all the other women he'll be sleeping with," Iris muttered, "And don't look at me like that," she added, spotting Alice's face, "You know perfectly well it's true. Oh sure, he'll stay loyal for a few weeks, maybe even a few months, but in the end, all that loyalty will be as truthful and factual as the loyalty of a pathological liar! He'll start sniffing out other places, and then he'll stop coming home for days…then weeks…then months. That boy is a dog, Alice." Her voice was a cold growl, "And no dog deserves my sister. My sister deserves someone who loves her and wants her like nothing else in this world. Every second of every minute of every day of every year…he needs to be longing for her. You need a man who…who you can look into those eyes and know he will never, ever abandon you…"

Alice felt tears burn her eyes. She knew Iris was right…she was always right. But the only man who had ever proven he would do that for her was lying in a hospital bed, thousands of miles away…and he would never wake up…

Iris cupped her chin, making her look back up at her. "Alice…your life isn't here…"

"My mother is here…" she whispered, sniffing slightly, "I have no where else to go…I wouldn't know where to go…I can't make a path on my own…"

Iris smiled gently, leaning forward to whisper in her ear, "If you don't know where you're going, any road will take you there…"

* * *

A/N: Invisible kudos to the person who can name that ending quote!


	8. Beauty is Only Skin Deep

A/N: Congratulations to my readers who figured out the ending quote from last chapter. Well done, well done!

* * *

Chapter 8: Beauty is only Skin Deep

"Marcus…" Sophia called, just before appearing around the corner, "Marcus, darling, have you seen Alice? I swear I've searched every inch of this place and I can't find her anywhere!"

Marcus looked up from the sink, where he was smoothing his hair back with a wet comb, "She's not anywhere?"

"No!" Sophia said rather dramatically, "I even checked the greenhouse, and there's no trace of her anywhere."

"Calm down, sweet," he assured her, kissing her cheek lightly, "I'll go talk to my mother. Just take a seat and have some tea, alright? All this stress isn't good for your health."

Sophia nodded and slumped into a seat, fanning herself. Marcus quickly moved out of the room and headed up the stairs to the next floor. After passing through a set of double doors, he found himself in a handsomely furnished office.

"Have you seen the girls?" he asked, or rather demanded.

"Can't you give your mother a Christian greeting before you start making demands, Marcus?" Sylvia said rather coolly, not looking up from the book in her hand. She was sitting in a high-backed armchair, royal purple cushioning and gold trimming; her hair was neatly braided then twisted up into a clip. Her dress was the same gold color as the trim around the chair cushions, with white lacing running up the sides.

He sighed heavily, "Good morning, Mother…"

"Good morning, Marcus," she said pleasantly, thought she still wasn't looking up, "What might I do for my son?"

"Have you seen the girls?" he asked, trying to keep himself in check.

"What's that?" she said, eyes on her book.

"Have…you…seen…your granddaughters…for the _third_ time!" he hissed through gritted teeth.

"No need to be so rude about it, young man," she scolded, "You _are_ talking to your grandmother, after all."

He could feel a muscle twitch in his jaw, "Now…in answer to your question," Sylvia commented, neatly marking her page with a bookmark and closing it, "The girls are not here."

"So I have discerned…" he said through gritted teeth, "Where are they?"

"Out,"

"Out _where_?"

"Out on the town,"

He blinked, "Out on the town?" he repeated.

"Yes," Sylvia said, "Iris took Alice out for a…what is that phrase you Americans use…? Oh yes, a girls' night out!"

"It's not even two o'clock yet!" Marcus checked his watch.

"I know that," Sylvia rolled her eyes, "Iris took her out for shopping first, and then they're going to hit the town, I believe is the phrase."

"You let _Iris_ take _Alice_ out…to shop...for _clothes_??"

"Certainly,"

"What," he said slowly, "could have possibly possessed you to allow such a thing, Mother?"

"Simple facts provided from your eldest child, Marcus." She answered smoothly.

"What?" he blinked.

"It's simple truth, darling," she said, opening her book and settling back to read again, "God knows Alice needs something more flattering than those _ghastly_ clothes Sophia makes her wear."

* * *

Alice looked around, her eyes wide. "Iris...are you serious? _This_ is where we're going to be shopping?"

"Certainly," Iris said, smiling broadly, "No expense spared, either; it will be only the best for my sister."

"Iris…I still think throwing my clothes out the window was a touch extreme…" she said as she followed the dark-haired woman through the store aisles.

Iris rolled her eyes, "Fine…maybe it was a touch over the top, but there was no way I was going to let you walk out of the house wearing those things again."

"But I'm wearing them now…"

"You won't be by the time I'm done with you."

She swallowed hard. That was definitely not an empty promise…

Iris dragged her by the hand, "Now…let's see here…"

* * *

"Marcus, this is entirely necessary…" Sylvia said, rolling her eyes, "I'm telling you, Iris is going to murder you if she finds out that you don't even trust her enough to go shopping with her sister."

"Iris has absolutely no business whatsoever bringing Alice shopping! Sophia is going to kill _me_ when Alice comes home wearing those clothes."

The older woman rolled her eyes, "Marcus…"

Sudden sounds of laughter alerted him right away, and Sylvia found her son dragging her through the aisles. He came to a sudden halt right outside a dressing room, ducking behind a clothes rack.

"Iris, you can't be serious! You want me to walk around like this?"

"Oh for the love of God, Alice…" she rolled her eyes, "You're not even showing that much skin! Now quit being such a scaredy-cat and try on the next thing."

A few minutes later, a groan was heard, "Get that look off your face, Alice! My god!"

"You can see my stomach!"

"Yes. God forbid, we show three whole inches of abdomen…"

Sylvia grabbed Marcus by the collar, "If you think for one minute that you are too old or too big to be put over my knee, Marcus Andrey DeLaine, you are sorely mistaken! Now, I think this has gone on long enough!"

"Don't rush him, Grandma," Iris said, poking her head of the dressing room, "If he wants to stay, we could certainly use some help carrying the bags."

"Who's hungry?" Marcus said immediately, standing quickly, "I'm ravenous! Come along, Mother, I just remembered this delightful little place down the road…"

Sylvia shook her head as he walked quickly out of the store. Her blue eyes turned back to Iris, "I can't wait to see what you bring her home in, Iris…" she murmured, "Make it something that lets her look feminine, won't you?"

"If I don't," Iris smiled, stepping back into the room, "Send me to bed without dinner."

* * *

Alice all but stumbled through the front door, steering her way carefully while peeking around the mountain of clothing piled on her arms, "Um…Iris…" she said, her voice muffled, "Isn't there a limit on how many of these we're allowed to bring home?"

"Don't be silly," Iris said casually, "That store is kissing our feet for these purchases. We just made them a fortune."

She stumbled slightly under the mountain, "I see…"

"Alright," Iris said, scooping up the top half of the pile in her own arms, "Let's get these to your closet."

"Iris, wait a minute,"

She paused, looking back at Alice, who was looking at her with a curious expression on her face, "What?"

She bit her lip, "Iris…you're asking me to wear things that show my body. I know you're not asking me to…dress like some sort of…slut…but still…these clothes…"

Iris looked at her in silence for a moment, then turned to walk up the staircase with Alice behind her. When they had reached Alice's bedroom, Iris closed and locked the door, "Take them off." She said softly.

She blinked, actually taking a step back , "What?"

"Take them off," Iris repeated calmly, "Take off your clothes."

Alice blinked again, a little bit nervous and frightened. When she had undressed before, Iris had either been out of the dressing room, or she wasn't looking. Not that she worried about stripping in front of her sister…they were both girls, after all…but all the same…she wasn't sure about this…

"Alice, do it," she knew that look all too well. It was Iris' "don't question, don't look at me like that, just do what I said" look. With a slow, hard gulp, she slowly reached down and tugged her shirt over her head, then pushed the skirt down. She looked at her sister nervously. Surely Iris didn't want her to…

"All the clothes,"

She bit her lip. Fighting back tears, she obeyed her sister's demands, letting her undergarments fall to the ground as well. She looked up at Iris now, wondering what sort of torture she had planned this time. She felt shy and exposed under her sister's gaze, feeling those blue eyes pierce and examine her body.

"Look in the mirror,"

"Iris…no," she choked out, "Please no…"

"Alice," she set her hands on her shoulders gently, "Trust me…do it."

She took a deep, shuddering breath, slowly turning around to look in the mirror, "What…what am I supposed to be seeing?" she whispered hoarsely.

"You are supposed to be seeing you…for _you_." Iris murmured gently in her ear, hands still gentle on her shoulders, "All you've ever seen yourself as is a frightened, timid girl…repressed by society's cold hands, hands that are ever tightening—clenching you more and more. But you don't have to be that anymore…"

"Iris…" she choked out, shaking her head, "I can't do this…I can never be like you."

"What do you mean?" she asked with a slight frown.

"I can't ever, ever be like you, Iris…" she nearly sobbed, "I could never be you…you're brave…and daring…and smart…and beautiful. You have the courage that I could never hope to have…you took society's bonds on you…and you threw it back in their face. You did it not only for yourself…but for the man you love..." she swallowed back the tears, though several were still slipping over down her face, "You fell in love with the one man that you could never be with—the man who everyone told you to stay away from…the man who…who people said was dangerous…and you could have—you _should_ have walked away from it all. You _should_ have nodded and smiled, folded your hands like a good little girl and gone back into the arms of someone who society said was _proper_ for you. But you _didn't_! You gave up everything for him! You threw away your old life…just to give your life to him. And even though it's been hard and painful, you haven't once said you regret it, and I know you don't regret it. I could _never_ be like that, Iris! I'm not brave, I'm not strong, and I'm not beautiful! I thought I could be happy, I really did. I thought that getting engaged was the greatest thing that ever could have happened to me…and now…n-now I see I was just playing society's puppet. But I'm not you, Iris. I'm not strong enough to break those chains…I'm not strong enough to cut away my strings and run away…b-b-because…I have no one to run back to! The one person I could run back to is lying in a coma, and people are saying he deserves it…because they don't know who he really is! But society won't let me tell them who he really is…because it isn't proper…and now I'm back where I started. I'm getting married in a month…and when that happens, it won't just be strings…it will be chains. Don't you see, Iris? You can walk away from this…I can't…I'm _not_ strong enough, and I've never _been_ strong enough…and I'll never _be_ strong enough…"

She couldn't go on; the tears were blinding her and bubbling up in her throat, making it impossible to talk and cry at the same time. But it was not the tears that she had cried when she had broken up with Billy. Those were loud, great racking sobs, ones that could easily have been taken as crocodile tears. But not these…no, these were soft tears that flowed in an endless river down her face. Some said if one actually cried aloud, one would feel better. That was a lie. It only made her feel worse…and she was tired of feeling that way. If anything, she just wanted to feel free, the way she always saw Iris. But the truth of her own words stung viciously at the open wounds of her heart. She would never be her sister…she was _nothing_ like her. Especially when it came to being beautiful…Iris was so beautiful. Ever since she first met her, Alice always thought so. From that mane of flowing ebony hair to her smooth pale skin; from her lean and graceful body to her stunning smile…everything was beautiful about her—undeniable, unchanging beauty. And Alice…was nothing. She had nothing compared to her sister…whatever Jervis claimed to have seen in her was well beyond her. There was nothing about her that was—

"You're wrong,"

Had she not seen her sister's lips move, she would not have known that Iris had spoken. Her voice was barely above a whisper, and it was that soft, stunned tone that Iris rarely used. However, if Alice thought that her demeanor was stunning, her next words stunned her speechless.

"You're wrong, Alice," she said softly, "I'm not brave…I'm not strong…and I'm certainly not courageous. I did walk away. I gave up everything for them…just like they threw away their lives, I threw away mine…only to pick up the pieces and try to start all over again. I promised them I would never leave…all those nights with Jonathan that I swore I would never leave him…and I broke each and every promise. Why? Because I wanted to make my father proud. He was never, ever proud of me when I was younger, when he was actually home, and now I have the responsibility of taking over his company, and I have to prove myself. But I was wrong…I don't belong here…I could never, ever, ever belong here…I want to go back…to be with the ones who knew me better than anyone. And you…you don't belong here either, Alice." Her hand touched her face, "You have never belonged here…"

She turned her back to the mirror, "I can't make you see yourself as beautiful, Alice…" she murmured, "But…you are. You _are_ beautiful, Alice…and one day you will see yourself for the talented, gentle, kind, and beautiful woman you are."

Her hand started to drift away from Alice's shoulder, only to be grabbed tightly by the blonde, pulling her back and wrapping her arm around. She let her head fall to her sister's shoulder and cried.

* * *

A/N: Glad to know that most of my reviewers have not failed to notice that this is a very angsty fic so far. There must always be angst before there is happiness. And there will be many, many happy moments to come in this fic, starting next chapter if I get at least...five reviews on this chapter. Start hitting that green button, folks!


	9. Won't You Join the Dance?

A/N: Alright, folks. Now I put some serious thought and dedication into this chapter. It is by far one of my greatest prides. Can I PLEASE get some really great reviews to go with such a great chapter? Pretty please?! I'm BEGGING you here!!!!

* * *

Chapter 9: Won't You Join the Dance?

"Marcus,"

"One moment, Mother," he answered, voice slightly muffled, "I can't get this blasted thing to turn right…"

"Marcus,"

"Hold on just a moment more…I'll have this up in a jiffy…just need a little—"

"Marcus!" Sylvia barked, "Will you kindly get your head out of your car and back to your children?!"

He looked up from the open hood of his vehicle, wiping his hands on a rust-colored rag. "Don't be ridiculous, Mother. My thoughts are always with my children."

"Indeed…" she said rather saucily, "Then I'm sure it's absolutely no surprise to you that neither of your daughters have come out of their rooms for the past two days…and that's why you're out here working on this car."

Marcus frowned, "What do you mean they hadn't come out of their rooms? For two whole days?"

_

* * *

_

The sun was shining on the sea,  
Shining with all his might:  
He did his very best to make  
The billows smooth and bright --  
And this was odd, because it was  
The middle of the night.

The moon was shining sulkily,  
Because she thought the sun  
Had got no business to be there  
After the day was done --  
'It's very rude of him.' she said,  
'To come and spoil the fun!'

"How rude indeed…" Alice murmured with a soft giggle. The blonde was curled up against her sister, her hair drawn up into a ponytail, wearing a pair of shorts and a white tank top. Iris was wearing her usual all black—this time a pair of shorts and a long-sleeved top—with her hair in a loose braid. Her knees were being used as a makeshift desk, upon which was propped Alice's copy of _Alice in Wonderland_.

Iris smiled at her sister's laughter, "About time…I thought I would never get another smile out of you."

"I'm sorry, Iris…but it's true, you know. What they say about crying…" she smiled slightly, "It really does make you feel better…"

"I know…" Iris said softly, "And when you get older…you forget about that. You forget that everyone needs to cry once in a while, or those feelings of pain, anger, frustration…even true sadness…they eat away at you like a cancer, until you can't possibly move anymore."

Alice looked at her; she could sense there was something more to what she was saying. "Iris…I don't remember the last time I saw you cry…"

She looked taken aback for a moment, then managed to regain her composure, "Oh…well, what reason would I have to be sad? I'm in a beautiful country, living in a beautiful house, with my grandmother, father and sister…why would I be sad in any way?"

Alice paused, there was some underlying sadness still lingering in Iris' voice…but if she wouldn't talk about it, there was nothing more to be said. Instead, Alice jumped off the bed, "Alright, Iris…how about I show you some of the outfits I made?"

Iris smiled widely, "Please do, darling sister."

She beamed and hurried behind the dressing curtain, tossing the shorts and shirt over the rack. After a few minutes, she stepped out and shyly struck a pose.

Iris laughed softly, clapping, "Very, very, very nice, little sister! You'll be breaking hearts if the rest look like that…"

Alice laughed, twirling in place, letting the light catch the shimmering, magenta material of her one-sided top. "You like it?"

"I love it, Alice, and you know that." Iris said with a loving smile, sliding off the bed to approach her, "You look beautiful no matter what…"

Alice smiled shyly, "Thank you…." She murmured.

"Glad to see you both are up and around," Marcus said, stepping into the room, followed by Sophia, "We have news,"

"What news…?" Iris said, looking at her father.

Sophia beamed, gliding over to her daughter, "Alice, darling…I have simply marvelous news! Your dear grandmother has agreed to throw a ball for you and Iris."

"What's the occasion?" Iris asked rather suspiciously.

"Why, the family company passing into new hands, of course!" Sophia laughed airily, "Silly child, you're the new owner of DeLaine Towers. It's only fitting that we throw you a party for such a wonderful occasion!"

Iris didn't look convinced, and frankly, neither was Alice, "Mother…you always said to save balls for specific occasions…like…engagements."

"Oh, don't be ridiculous!" Sophia threw her head back with a laugh, "There's always time for change, and what better time than now to make such a change? This will be the most elegant, most extraordinary ball this family has _ever_ thrown, darlings! Isn't that right, Sylvia?"

The matriarch merely nodded, her expression quite similar to Iris'. Sophia beamed, "Well then, since that's all settled, we'll leave you girls back to your business. Come along, darling…" she crooned, roping her arms around Marcus.

Alice moaned and collapsed into the nearest chair, "First, she commands me around like she's the Queen of Hearts and I'm the card soldier," she groaned, hand over her eyes, "Then, she's sweet and loving and grinning like the Cheshire Cat! What's next?!"

Iris stifled a small laugh, "Perhaps next she'll be cooing and singing to you like the Door Mouse, Alice," she smiled with a twinkle in her ear, "Twinkle, twinkle, little bat…."

"How I wonder what you're at…." Alice finished, looking a bit more relaxed.

"Your mother means well, Alice…" Sylvia said softly, "At least, that is my hope…but my hope has been misplaced before."

"Don't talk about yourself like that, Grandma," Iris said softly, "You're an excellent judge of character. You picked out Grandpa, didn't you?"

The elder's face softened at the mention of her late husband, "Yes…I suppose I did…" she sighed softly, sitting down upon the bench resting against the footboard. "Yes, I certainly did. He was my best friend…I only wish I'd seen it when I was younger. We could have had so many more years together…but those I spent with him where the best I ever had…"

Alice swallowed slightly, her eyes slowly falling downward. Sylvia paused, "Alice, love, what's the matter?"

"It's…it's nothing really." She said softly, "But…that reminds me of someone I know too. A…a very dear friend of mine."

"Oh? Who is this friend?"

She swallowed, "It's….Iris, what are you doing?"

Iris had stood up, twirling lightly in place, "Will you, won't you, will you, won't you…won't you join the dance?"

Alice gasped with delight as her hands were grasped tightly right before her sister pulled her up from the chair. Her gasp turned into laughter as Iris spun her around the room in a dance. Sylvia watched her granddaughters with soft and loving eyes, eyes that slowly drifted to the window, far away from the room for a moment.

"Iris!" Alice cried out, laughing as the dark-haired girl grabbed her around the waist, spinning them both in place. She watched the world rush by, all objects blending in a great blur of color. Her eyes slowly closed, feeling a nighttime breeze rush through her hair and across her face…cool grass beneath her shoes…a park, highlighted by moonlight, swirling in a pool of mixed colors around her…and being wrapped in two strong and gentle arms…staring into the most incredible blue eyes she'd ever seen…

Suddenly, as quickly as it all had begun, everything came to a halt as both sisters collapsed down onto the bed. Both were laughing, laughing like they hadn't in months…maybe years. Alice stared up at the ceiling; though her head still felt dizzy, it felt clearer than it had for the past two weeks. Of course, as with all moments of clarity, there came a few unwanted memories…but perhaps this was the memory that needed to be understood…the one that needed to be accepted after all this time…

_

* * *

_

Two years ago…

Alice stared blankly at the wall, still wiping a few stray tears from her eyes. She didn't know why she was so terribly upset about this…maybe it was just the fact that she didn't have a boyfriend anymore. Yes, that had to be it…now she no longer had anyone to make her mother happy about. And her mother certainly wasn't going to be happy about Alice breaking up with "good money". And it would just that too—it was all Alice's fault. Never mind that it was _Billy_ who had gotten so defensive…never mind that it was _Billy_ who had said he never wanted to see her again…never mind that it was _Billy_ who had been an absolute control freak since day one…nope, none of that mattered. All that mattered was that _Alice_ had lost her hold on "good money". Oh, this would be an absolutely, as Jervis would say, "unfrabjuous" conversation to look forward to. Happy day…

She sighed heavily, leaning back against the couch to stare up at the ceiling. She was between exhausted from crying for the past two hours, embarrassed that she had done so in front of Dr. Cates, frustrated and angry at not being able to hold down a steady boyfriend for longer than half a year, and frankly, just plain bored. She almost wished she'd taken Jervis up on that offer to borrow his book for a day. He always seemed to find such enjoyment in _Alice in Wonderland_…maybe she could to. She'd have to ask him about it tomorrow at work.

Her fingers started picking at the tiny hole in the arm of her couch. She wished something would happen. More than anything, she wished Jervis was here…was here to quote Carroll randomly just to get a laugh out of her, which he never failed in doing. He could always make her laugh…really laugh, not just that fake simper she put on in public with Billy. If only more guys in the world were like him…or maybe it was better that he was one of a kind. A smile tugged at her mouth at the thought. If he was one of a kind…that just made her the luckiest girl in the world to know him…

KNOCK. KNOCK. KNOCK.

She frowned slightly, tilting her head to the door. Who on earth would be calling right now? Granted, it wasn't late, but still…she never got visitors. Of course Billy would come knocking whenever he pleased, and she did have a friend from school who had started coming over, but Billy wasn't speaking to her…and her new friend was spending a lot of time in the library, looking up research for a senior thesis…so who could it be…?

"Jervis?"

If someone had told her what she was now seeing before her own eyes, she might have recommended they see a good doctor. She blinked a few times before she could actually comprehend and accept that she wasn't hallucinating. Standing in front of her door, at eight o'clock at night, was her boss. He was dressed in blue pants, white shoes with black shined toes, a blue trench coat, a bright lime shirt and a large, dark bow tie. To complete this unexpected look, he was donning a top hat with a bright blue ribbon around the brim. She had to squint slightly to read the card that was tucked into the band: _In this style 10/6_. He looked just like…

"Good evening, Miss Pleasance," he said, bowing low with a _swoosh_ of his hat, "I'm here to help you forget your recent heartbreak."

She paused, taking a few steps back as he approached her, setting the hat back on his head, "Gotham can be…a Wonderland, Alice! Tonight…let me be your guide."

Her eyes went from his outstretched hand to his attire and back to his hand. "I'll…get my coat." She said slowly, turning to get it. A tiny smile curved her lips.

_Maybe this night won't be so bad after all…_

* * *

"Jervis…how did you think of all this?" Alice asked, looking around the park, "First the carriage ride, then dinner…and now this? You're spoiling your secretary!" she added with a teasing smile.

"Oh pish tosh," he chuckled, helping her over a small bridge, "Think of it as your birthday present."

"You already got me something this year…"

"Then consider it an early gift…or a late one, which ever you prefer."

She laughed again, shaking her head, "You really are spoiling me, though…" she said, looking anything but displeased. This entire night, she had felt like a princess.

"Ah, don't rush us to the end yet, my dear…" he said with a smile.

"Hm?" she looked at him, only to have his gloved hand cup over her eyes.

"No peeking at the surprise quite yet…" he said, one arm tenderly around her waist to guide her through the park. She could smell something sweet…like flowers…where was he taking her?

"Here we are…" he said softly, gently setting her down to sit upon something soft yet firm…and cool. His gloved hand pulled away from her eyes, returning her sight. She felt her breath catch. It was quite plain that they were in the _Alice in Wonderland_ section of the park. She was sitting upon a mushroom, next to a great sculpture that depicted the Caterpillar from the book, resting upon a giant mushroom…and all around them were colorful, sweet smelling flowers. She finally managed to get her breath back as she watched Jervis slip onto the bench-like structure on the Caterpillar's bench. He leaned back, lightly tossing his hat up into the air and catching it.

"This is incredible…" Alice murmured, gazing all around, "It's…it's beautiful, Jervis."

"You know…_Alice in Wonderland_ was always my favorite story," he said with a gentle smile. He sat upright as though a thought had suddenly come to him, "Do you remember the Mock Turtle's song?"

She was about to say she hadn't read the story since she was in high school, but he was already off the bench, twirling about in the grass.

"Will you, won't you, will you, won't you…" his voice was a soft, soothing murmur as he turned back to her, holding out his hand, "Won't you join the dance?"

Something about his words…and his voice…and his eyes…before she knew it, her hand had reached out and set in his. He gently pulled her from her seat, and she found herself enveloped in his arms. They began to dance across the green fields, twirling round and round amongst the sweet scent of the flowers. She would have normally felt dizzy by all the spinning, but she felt fine…in fact, she felt completely fine. All around them were pooling into nothing more than a whirl of color and light, leaving only them alone…dancing together. The smile he wore was the kindest, most gentle smile that she had ever seen on his face, and the smile reflected in his eyes. They seemed to be a brighter shade of blue than ever before…whether it was the light, or something else…something that she thought she recognized, but a part of her either was in denial of it, or simply couldn't understand it. But whatever it was, she loved it…she loved it…

"Thank you for a wonderful night," Alice said, smiling with a happiness she wasn't sure she had ever felt before. She reached out to touch his face, "You're a terrific friend…"

"Till tomorrow, dear Alice," he said, placing a kiss upon her hand. She walked up the steps to her door, turning back to look at him, "Tomorrow," he added, "And every day after…"

She smiled, watching him dance down the sidewalk. Slowly, she went inside, draping her coat over the rack. She went into her living room, falling backwards against the door, closing it tightly, and slid downward slightly, her hand over her heart. She could feel it racing beneath her palm, beating wild and untamable. Her head felt wonderfully dizzy, she felt like she was walking on air…air that smelt just like those flowers in the park. How could a person feel so incredible, wonderful…and all in one night? She sighed, pushing away from the door to spin slowly around the room before coming to a stop beside her window. There was something new inside her…something that felt like…

"Alice?"

She froze, turning around, "Billy?"

* * *

"Iris, Alice,"

The blonde was startled out of her memory by her father's voice from the doorway, "Come along, girls," he said, "Your mother's downstairs with your dresses for the dance. It _is_ only in one week, after all. Come along, chop, chop."

Iris rolled her eyes, pushing herself off the bed and following her grandmother to the door, "You alright, Alice?" she said, pausing in the doorway.

"I'm fine," she said quickly, "Just…just thinking…I'll be alright."

Iris raised an eyebrow but let the matter drop, letting Alice retreat back into her own thoughts for a brief moment of bliss. Her eyes slowly drifted over to the figurine, standing upon her windowsill, where the moonlight was pouring down upon it, highlighting all aspects of its simple perfection…as well as what it stood for. Lately, she began to feel like it was a goal that she was trying to set for herself but could never reach. Oh, she wanted to reach it alright…but she was still tied—a puppet bound for what seemed forever, doomed to serve society for the rest of its days. But that feeling that she hadn't felt for nearly two years was blooming inside her again…and it was dangerous…but wonderful. Just like that night had been….simply wonderful…

Alice thought she knew what that feeling was. And that in itself…that was even more dangerous.

* * *

A/N: Like I said, please give me some reviews! PLEASE!!!!!


	10. Open Your Heart With Your Key

A/N: A big thank you to my readers. Thanks for the support!

* * *

Chapter 10: Open Your Heart with Your Key

Alice groaned softly, head tossing and turning to try and avoid the tiny paws swatting at her face. Finally, after a few minutes of persistent batting, she turned over completely, "Let me sleep, Cheshire…go find something to tear up…"

"She did,"

Alice nearly fell out of bed at the highly irate tone coming from her doorway; looking over, she saw iris holding a book in one hand, her other on her hip. "My book…" she growled.

"Oh come on, Iris…it's not even that badly torn…" Alice said, rubbing her eyes, "I'll buy you another copy…"

"Just keep that little demon creature away from my books!"

"Demon creature? Iris, she's not as bad as that…" she shook her head, stroking Cheshire's head gently, "I think you're making a big deal about nothing…"

"Uh huh," Iris said, looking less than amused, "And if it was your copy of _Alice in Wonderland_, you'd be at my throat, so don't give me that nonsensical logic of yours."

"_Nonsensical logic_?" Alice repeated, stifling a giggle, "Honestly, sometimes I think you spent _way_ too much time with Jervis."

Iris rolled her eyes, giving the kitten a death glare that sent it scurrying behind Alice, "Just keep her away, alright?" she mumbled with a groan, rubbing her head. The blonde shook her head, smiling.

"You ought to be nicer to her," she commented, "She's just a little kitten…"

"She's a bloody demon child…" Iris muttered, her voice muffled against the cushioning of the couch which she had flopped down on. Alice merely rolled her eyes with a laugh. Cheshire slowly looked around the corner, as though to check whether or not it was safe to come out.

Iris sighed, propping herself up on her elbows, "Where're the adults?"

"Mother insisted that Grandma and Daddy go with her to pick out a few things for the ball…" Alice said with a frown, "You know, for a party that's only supposed to be for you, Mother certainly is going all out…and you're not even her daughter."

"Oh _please_, Alice," the older girl commented dryly, "You honestly think that your mother is only throwing this pointless event for someone she isn't even slightly related to, and seeing as she holds no relation to this person, is simply throwing this _wondrous_ party out of the goodness of her heart? Your mother isn't a saint, Alice…you don't have to psychoanalyze her to know she has something else planned…"

Alice sighed softly, "I know you're right, Iris…I just…what do you think she's planning?"

Iris shrugged, staring up at the ceiling, "God only knows…I'd rather not even contemplate that right now…" she sighed heavily, sitting upright and staring out the ceiling, "They're back…"

* * *

"What do you think of this, darling?" Sophia asked, twirling in place.

Marcus was sitting slumped in his chair, one hand holding his face in an upright position, while his eyelids were drooping, "Sophia, darling…I don't mean to be…rude…but we've spent the entire afternoon looking at your gowns for the dance. Can't I see what you got the girls?"

"Don't be ridiculous," she laughed, "Whatever happened to your sense of surprise, my love?"

He sighed heavily, "Forgive my ignorance…." He commented, rubbing his eyes.

"Don't worry…." She said, swaying her hips as she walked towards him. Her arms roped around his neck, leaning close to him, "I can make it up to you later…" her voice went low and sultry.

Marcus blinked a few times before carefully moving her off him, "Make it up to me _later_, darling…right now I need to speak with Iris. She hasn't been herself lately…"

She sighed, though her arms were still tight around him, "Have you told Iris the news yet…?"

He swallowed hard, "No…no, I haven't had a chance to tell her."

"Well, hurry up, love…don't you want your daughter to know the glorious news?" she purred into his neck.

"Of course…" he said, "I'll be back, dear…"

She kissed him deeply before releasing him, strolling back behind the curtain. Rubbing the back of his neck with a small sigh, he made it out his door and closed it behind him…only to come face-to-face with the blue eyes of his eldest daughter, frigid with anger.

He took a step back, "Iris…what's wrong?"

"You're actually going to do it?" she spoke in a voice that was barely above a hiss, "You're still going to marry her!"

Marcus opened his mouth to answer, with the mind to put Iris in her place, only to be cut off by Sylvia's soft voice from behind them. "Iris," she said softly, reaching out for her, "Dear, I wish to speak with you…would you come with me?"

"Certainly," Iris said coldly, throwing her father a look of sheer fury before walking away with her grandmother.

* * *

Sylvia led her to a large room, much larger than any in the rest of the house, aside from the master suite where the matriarch slept. This room, unlike the bedroom, had three walls of windows, flooding it with natural and pure light. The floor was tiled, like the rest of the room, but covered by tarps in some places. All along the windows were canvases of all shapes and sizes, all covered in painted images. There was a high stack of clean, untouched canvases on a shelf to the far left; the smell of paint with a hint of turpentine lingered in the air. Iris looked around with a small smile; she'd only been inside her grandmother's art studio once before, and back then it had been filled with paintings of her late grandfather. Now, the images on the canvases depicted various scenes of nature, as well as a few other pictures that she couldn't quite make out. Right now, her grandmother was leading her over to a large canvas covered with a sheet. This was obviously the picture Sylvia was working on right now, as it was in the centre of the room, where the light shone best, and there was a tray of paint and brushes beside it.

"I need your opinion on something," Sylvia announced, sliding elegantly onto the chair, "I know very little about him, but perhaps you can help, no?"

Iris watched as the sheet was gently pulled away from the painting. Her hand went to her mouth in surprise, only to slowly lower back to her heart as a tear slipped down her face, "Grandmamma…it's perfect…it's absolutely perfect."

"Alas, it is not yet finished…" she said, looking at it, "There is much to yet be known about him before it can be completed. I wish to know it, Iris…"

"Grandmamma, I only know so much…"

"No, child, you must learn of him from the one who knows him best." She said softly.

Iris shook her head, "Alice is still devoted to her mother's plan for her life, not to mention she's going to have to deal with that…boy…" she all but spat out the word.

Sylvia looked at her for a long moment, "You don't really like him, do you?" she said with a twinkle in her blue eyes.

"There is nothing for her in that relationship, only to become a trophy wife for a man who doesn't respect her," Iris said, leaning against the wall and crossing her arms, "He sees money and maybe a body that he can use to gratify himself every now and then. He doesn't see what I see…what Jervis saw…"

"And what is that?" Sylvia asked, observing her granddaughter gently.

Iris looked out the window, her eyes seeing past the English countryside. "Alice…she's so talented…so gentle and kind…so loving to all that she comes in contact with…and she's beautiful. Not just on the outside, but she beautiful inside too…God, I only wish she could see that beauty. At first, it might not seem like anything special, but after a while…it starts to shine through. It's like the flower that blooms late. It stays locked up inside because no one expects anything of it; they all think that there is nothing to it, nothing at all…and then it opens up, and it's the rarest beauty of all. The flower was withholding a stunning beauty that no one ever expected to find in such a locked up creation…and once it's unfolded its petals to let its beauty shine forth, with no more restraints or masks…it captivates everyone and everything. That is who Alice is inside, I know it…and more importantly, so did Jervis. That's why he fell in love with her, no matter what those ignorant simpletons back home say, he loved her for who she was inside. She is such an angel…and she doesn't even see it."

"Perhaps she needs assistance…" Sylvia murmured softly, dabbing at her eyes where tears had formed at the gentle words.

"How can I give that to her?" Iris said, dropping down onto a chair, "I…I only want her to understand…I want her to understand why Jervis loved her…he didn't just lust for her…he loved her."

"I do understand,"

Iris and Sylvia froze, seeing Alice standing in the doorway, tear tracks down her face. It was perfectly evident that she had heard everything. Iris stood up, reaching for her, "Alice…"

She didn't even get another thought out before her younger sister had thrown herself against Iris, clutching at her with tears slipping down her face, "Oh, Iris…I'm not all that…I'm nothing that special…"

"Yes, you are…" Iris whispered into her hair, "You're the rarest flower that hasn't come out of bloom yet…the shining star that hasn't quite flooded the night sky with its light…but you will soon."

"You'll help me?" she murmured against her chest.

"No, my sweet sister…" she whispered, lifting her face gently to look into their eyes, "Only you have the key to your own heart."


	11. A Frightful Surprise

* * *

Chapter 11: A Frightful Surprise

"You…cannot…be…serious…"

Iris and Alice stood frozen with expressions of mingled horror and disgust; even Cheshire looked appalled. The dresses that Sophia had brought up for them were hanging on the doorway, displayed in all their horror. Alice swallowed hard, "Well…maybe they won't be so bad after we…you know, try them on."

"Nice try, sis," Iris said a few minutes later, shaking her head, "But not even your figure can salvage that thing…"

Alice ran her hands through her hair in frustration, "What are we supposed to do? The dance starts in two hours!"

Iris paused, then started circling Alice for a moment. Then, she started doing something very strange indeed: her hands moved around, as though taking invisible measurements; her mouth was moving though she didn't actually speak. Finally, after a few minutes of this strange behavior, Iris turned to the dresser and pulled out a pair of scissors and a sewing kit. Alice blinked, "Iris…what?"

"This dress might yet be salvageable…" she commented with a smile that usually preceded one of her unexpected and startling plans. Alice had long since learned to simply go along with these plans, and if her sister was going to make this atrocious dress an elegant gown...then she was all for it.

"Now…" Iris said, holding the scissors carefully, "Let's see…if we can make this work…first of all, these are coming off."

Alice felt her arms suddenly come into contact with the cool breeze flowing in through the open windows; one by one, the sleeves fell from the dress. "And next...this nauseating bought of lace…" Iris said, the scissors happily snipping away, "And now…let's see if this skirt can't use a little fixing up…"

* * *

"Much better…" Iris said happily, observing her handiwork with extreme satisfaction, "Much, much, _much_ better…just a few more little touches, and you'll be ready to go."

"And then we need to get _you_ ready, Iris," Alice said, not daring to look at herself in the mirror until Iris gave permission, "And what do you mean, a few more touches?"

Iris raised an eyebrow, "Alice, darling…not to be cruel—so don't take offense to this—but…have you ever heard of makeup?"

* * *

"Alice, for the last time, stop moving!" Iris said impatiently, "Honestly, you squirm more than that cat of yours."

"Iris, look, I appreciate what you're trying to do…" Alice said, "But I don't think there is anything to work with."

The dark-haired girl smirked, "We'll see about that…" she said, slowly turning the chair around, "What say you to that, ye of little faith?"

Alice started to protest again, only to see herself in the mirror and feel her breath catch. Even though she had never really worn makeup, she knew enough and had watched Iris enough to know that her sister really hadn't put that much on her. And yet, such a little amount had done so much. All the attention had been focused on her eyes, making them the most noticeable part of her face. Her lips were painted a simple yet stunning shade of pink, giving them a natural shimmer that captured and sealed away the tiniest flicker of light. She swallowed hard, hardly daring to believe it. Her hair had been curled slightly, then released to fall gently down her back. Iris had slipped a pale blue rose into the curls, adding to the subtle framing of her face. Everything was simple, nothing exaggerated…and yet she barely recognized herself. "Iris… this isn't real…I can't do this…this isn't me…"

"Yes…" Iris said, holding her shoulders gently, "Yes…yes, it is, Alice. This isn't a dream, it's not an illusion…this is who you are, Alice. This is who you _really_ are. It's time to take that key and unlock your heart…for good."

* * *

Marcus stood beside the refreshment bar, sipping his wine thoughtfully. No, he really didn't care for alcohol, but since he was safe from the mental effects of it, he supposed one or two tonight wouldn't hurt. Of course, seeing as he was letting Sophia run Alice's life entirely, and he had finally succeeded in infuriating his eldest child, perhaps it would be more than only one or two drinks tonight.

"Marcus, where are the girls?" Sylvia asked, "Their party has already started."

"I'm not sure…" he admitted, looking around, "Perhaps they're still getting ready."

"Marcus, you could show a little more interest in your children…" she said with a disapproving tone.

"Mother, Iris has already made it perfectly clear she wants nothing to do with me," he said with a quiet groan, "And I think Sophia is already doing an excellent job of being interested in Alice…"

"Perhaps a little _too_ good of a job…" she muttered, sipping her water, "And Iris would be perfectly happy to have you in her life if you would….would…."

Her voice trailed off as she stared up the top of the staircase. Marcus curiously followed her gaze, only to feel his grip slacken slightly on his glass.

Alice stood with Iris at the top of the staircase, dressed entirely in _anything_ but what Sophia had purchased for them, talking calmly with some of the party guests. Iris, as always, had gone for the simple look, dressed in a strapless black gown that sported a knee-high slit on one side. Alice…Alice was an entirely different story. The gown was the same color as the dress her mother had bought for her…which meant Iris had done a few alterations…actually, more like redesigned the entire dress. The skirt flowed in shimmering folds of frosty turquoise down to the floor, with a subtly defined waist marked by a darker shade of turquoise that covered the bodice of the gown. There were no sleeves, but Iris had created a pair of straps on both arms that slipped down the shoulders to leave them bare. There was a silver chain wrapped around her neck, though he couldn't make out the pendant attached.

Alice swallowed hard; though she was doing her best not to show it, she was shaking. She felt nervous, out of place…frightened…but she felt beautiful. Perhaps not so much as Iris would have liked her to feel, but she still felt simply beautiful…she'd never felt like this before. Her eyes drifted down to where her father stood, mouth agape, and gently nudged Iris. Her sister followed her line of vision and nodded; both moved down the staircase to their father and grandmother. Sylvia had regained her composure quickly and wrapped both girls in a warm embrace. "My goodness…you both look absolutely stunning! Aren't they magnificent, Marcus?"

He blinked a few times, "Where…did you get those dresses?"

"They're the same ones that we had before, Daddy." Alice said with a smile, twirling in place to show it, "Iris just did a little redesigning."

He looked them over again; how on earth these gowns could possibly be the same ones he had watched Sophia purchase was beyond him…but the girls wouldn't have had time to go out and buy new dresses. They had only just been shown the gowns two hours ago, and he would have known if they'd slipped out…Iris certainly had a hand with alteration, to put it mildly. He swallowed hard, feeling a slight pang as he saw Sophia talking with a young man. He had done it…he had actually lied to his daughters. He had never done that before…he might not have been there to raise them properly, but he had never lied…until now.

"You both look…beautiful." He said, trying to pull himself together, "Your mother will be pleased."

"Pleased?" Alice repeated, "Why would she care? This is Iris' party, not mine…"

He froze. Damnit, he had said it….but he had to. He had to say it…to try and prepare her for what was coming. He had many, many faults…but he could never lie to his own children.

"Dad…what are you talking about?" Iris said, her eyes reading clearly into his thoughts. Before he could explain any further, however, Sophia's voice cut through the silence.

"Alice, my darling, you look perfect! A perfect gown for your fiancé!"

Alice was about to say something…something that faded from her thoughts instantly as her mother wrapped her in one arm and thrust her into another pair of waiting arms. Her eyes widened in mingled horror, "Billy…?"

"Alice, thank goodness! I've been so worried about you…" he leaned in for a kiss, but her head turned quickly away.

"Mother…what's going on?" she said, her voice stunned. This…this couldn't be…her mother said it was for Iris…no…not this…

"Isn't it obvious?" Sophia beamed, "I had to surprise you! Billy darling has come up just in time for your wedding!"

"Wedding…?" she repeated, her head spinning violently. Oh god, she felt sick…

"Yes! You two are getting married in two days. Well, technically, in a few hours, you'll be getting married in one day. But never mind the technicality," she smiled at Alice in Billy's arms, "Isn't it wonderful, darling?"

She couldn't breathe…the room was spinning too fast, she couldn't see straight. This wasn't happening…she had broken up with Billy for a reason…but what was the reason? What really was the reason…?

"Excuse me…" she said, pushing out of his arms, "I…I need some air…"

* * *

A/N: I'm sure you all would like to kill me right now, or at least kill Billy, but just give me a nice little review and I'll make you happy next chapter.


	12. In His Eyes

A/N: Since this fic is running parallel to "Unchained Hearts", I wanted to clarify a time line here. This chapter takes place right after the chapter "Wandering Child" in "Unchained Hearts". Just wanted to clarify that for everyone. Give me some great reviews, people. The revelation you've been waiting for has finally come!

* * *

Chapter 12: In His Eyes

Alice ran outside…running past the doors, past the gate, and she didn't stop until she'd reached the gardens. Her head hurt, her stomach hurt…God, everything hurt. She could barely breathe, and she felt sick. She leaned against one of the many pillars surrounding the gardens in Grandma Sylvia's estate, trying to catch her breath and collect herself. Why was life so…painful? Why was _love_ so painful? Why couldn't everything be simple and clear?

Of course, she knew the answer to that almost instantly: because life wasn't meant to be fair. She had been protected her entire life, but that had done more damage than good. She had always been taught that it was the woman's job to be seen and not heard, and then to obediently marry whichever man wanted to "purchase" her first, as long as he was from good money. That was the lesson of life…the only lesson her mother ever bothered to teach her. No doubt that was why she hadn't been able to see Jervis' feelings for her. He never had made any sort of…advance until that night in the park. But that only made him the first real gentleman she had ever met. Always so gentle…always smiling, even when he probably didn't feel like it, he was always smiling…and he could always bring a smile to her face, no matter what had happened. How it was possible for him to make all her worries melt away with the tiniest gesture, she would never know…all she knew was that it was possible. And all the times he had just sat and talked with her…granted, a lot of his explaining of the technology he worked on went over her head, but just the fact that he thought of her enough to sit and talk with her meant more than she could ever express. After all, when she was with Billy, if he didn't have the time to talk with her, he never bothered to try and make time. And she was supposed to sit down, fold her hands in her lap like a good little girl, and keep her mouth shut. But Jervis never did that to her…he made her feel like she was a person…even when he had chipped her, he treated her like a princess. She felt like she was wanted, like someone cared about her…like someone loved her…

A soft and gentle wind swirled throughout the gardens, rustling her hair almost lovingly. Her eyes closed, and suddenly, something clicked in her mind. It was as though, in one rushing moment, with the reappearance of her ex-fiancé, everything made itself perfectly clear. She took a deep, shuddering breath, feeling her heart race madly under her fingertips.

"Alice?"

She turned quickly, seeing Iris standing there, looking like she'd run from inside to find her. "What are you doing out here? And you look like you're about to have a heart attack…"

"What are _you_ doing out here?" Alice said, brushing some hair aside, "I thought you would be—"

"Alice…" Iris said slowly, "You're wearing the pendant….the one Jervis gave you…"

"Yes…yes, I am." She said softly, not looking at her sister.

"You're engaged to another man, Alice," Iris said quietly, "What are you doing wearing that pendant?"

"You sound like Mother…" she said in a rather edgy tone.

"Answer me…" she said softly, her eyes boring into Alice from behind.

"I can wear it if I want…" she said slowly. Why was she doing this? She should be saying this to her mother…not Iris…not the only person who had actually supported her throughout this entire mess, even when Alice had lost her temper at her. So why was Iris interrogating her like this?

"Your mother…and Billy aren't going to like that…not one little bit…"

"Iris, stop!" she burst out, "Why are you talking like this? You sound like…like them!" Suddenly, a thought occurred to her. Was Iris testing her? Was this one of her unexpected and often remotely painful tests that she hurled at Alice with little to no warning? Yes, it had to be…she wouldn't turn on her like this…but that wouldn't make answering her questions any easier. She swallowed hard and waited for Iris' answer.

"For god's sake, I'm trying to get you to admit the truth, Alice!" she said, running her fingers through her hair in frustration, "I'm trying to get you to face the truth…a truth that you have been running from for two years! But you can't run anymore, Alice, and you know it! You can't keep denying this…it will eat you up inside until you can't breathe anymore! Just like you told me this morning, Alice…you can't fight who you are!"

"I'm NOT trying to fight who I am!!" she burst out indignantly, "That's not what I'm trying to do! I just…I can't say it, alright?! I know it's true inside, but I can't say it!"

"You have to say it!"

"Why?! Why do I have to say it, Iris? You already know it!"

"Yes, I know it!" Iris said furiously, "I may know it—hell with it, the whole _universe_ could know it, Alice! It doesn't matter! You have to say it aloud—admit it to yourself, or it will _never_ seem real! You need to say it, and say it now!"

"I LOVE HIM!"

Alice couldn't believe the words had just come out of her mouth…it was out there. She had said it, and she could never take it back. It was out in the open…and with a soft pang, she realized something: she was telling the truth. Iris was gazing at her with an odd, unreadable expression. Alice swallowed hard, taking a deep breath.

"I love him…" she repeated, breathing hard, "Okay?! There, I said it—I love him! I love him…" tears were coming to her eyes, "It hurts how much I love him…I love Jervis Tetch so much that it is making me _crazy_! It's making me crazy just like it did for five years as his secretary, alright?! I love him so much that I can't stop thinking about him…I couldn't back then, when it wasn't right for me to be in love with my boss, and I can't fight it now, when it's _still_ not right for me to be in love with him!! But I can't help it!! God, lately I've wished that I could just take my feelings and throw them away and be done with this conflict that has been ripping me apart for the past two years, but I can't! And I can't marry Billy—this time I'm not even going to try to deny it! I can't marry someone I'm not in love with….and you know that, Iris."

"I know it perfectly well," Iris said calmly, "Why?"

"Why?" she repeated, blinking in surprise.

"Why…why do you love him? What about him makes you so…crazy?"

Alice paused, her eyes diverting to the gardens. But they didn't seem to be the gardens anymore…they had transformed into the lush green grass of a park, with great, vibrantly colored flowers towering all around while two people danced together. No longer were they employer and employee…but two people alone together, dancing in their own Wonderland. She could feel herself falling into the depths of his blue eyes again…taking comfort in the warmth and gentleness of his arms…the stars a hazy heaven up above them…nothing else existing, only them…alone…together…

"Everything…" she whispered, "But when he danced with me…something happened…I couldn't fight back the emotions I saw in his eyes…I couldn't ignore the feelings inside myself…and when I heard he was in the hospital…when they said he might never wake up…" she slowly slid down the pillar to the soft grass below, "I…It was like my entire world came crashing down. I…I need to see him…" tears made their way down her face, "I have to see him…I can't…I can't do this anymore. I have to see him…I have to know he's okay…"

Iris knelt beside her, gently wiping the tears away. "Alice…"

* * *

"Girls,"

Both looked up almost instantly at the sound of Marcus' voice…but something was different about it. His voice wasn't as calm and collected as it usually was; it was empty and hollow…and hoarse, as though he'd been…crying.

"Dad…?" Iris whispered, her voice dying as she saw her father's face. His eyes were red, and tears still seeped down his face. Before she could get another word out, he had fallen to his knees and wrapped both his daughters in a tight embrace.

"Daddy?" Alice whispered, startled and yet still comforted by the closeness of his body.

"Forgive me," he whispered, "Forgive this foolish man, my babies…I thought I was doing the right thing, I really did…I never imagined all I doing was breaking apart the spirits of my most precious children…I thought I was making you two happy…"

"By taking me away from Gotham?" Iris said in disbelief, "I told you…you knew how much they mean to me! How much I love Jonathan, and how much Alice cares about Jervis! Why did you rip us away from the one place we had to call home?"

"I thought we could start over…" he said, releasing them with an odd look on his face, a look that soon turned in a saddened smile, "I guess…I suppose my back was turned for so long that I never realized that my daughters had already started over without me. They found new homes, new lives…love and family…and all without my instruction. I really messed this up, didn't I?"

Alice and Iris shared a look, then looked back at him with a smile, "Yes…" Alice nodded, "Yes, Dad…you kind of did…."

He nodded in turn, taking their hands and lifting them gently into a standing position. "Well…maybe it's not too late to fix that."


	13. Come Back to Me

A/N: In response to my many wonderful reviewers, this is the chapter you've been saying must happen, and so it has! The chapter where Alice goes to see Jervis in the hospital! Please enjoy, and please review for me!

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Chapter 13: Come Back To Me

"This is most unexpected, Miss…Pleasance, was it? The poor dear doesn't get any visitors…I guess people have just given up on him already…"

Alice shook her head slightly, "No…he…he doesn't have family."

"You know him, sweetie?" the nurse was short and rather plump, with a muss of brown curls pinned up in a bun. Her lips were painted a simple shade of pink; she had a plump but kind, motherly face and soft brown eyes.

"Yes…yes, I do," Alice nodded, "He…he doesn't have family anymore…only him."

"Oh dear…" she clucked her tongue sympathetically, "Well, at least he has you, right?"

"_Sometimes, Alice…I think you're the __**only**__ one who understands me…"_

She had been so taken aback by the sudden memory that she hadn't even heard the nurse continue talking until she felt a light touch on her shoulder, "You alright, honey?"

"I'm fine…sorry…" she said, rubbing her head lightly.

"Here we are," the other woman said, opening up a door, "You take as long as you want, sweetheart…let me know if you need anything."

Alice nodded and silently stepped into the room, waiting until the nurse closed the door behind her. Slowly, she turned and looked to the center of the room. This room was just like all the others in the Medical Center…and yet it wasn't. She had often heard people say that all hospital rooms are the same until you know the person lying on the bed. If there were anything close to absolute truths, such words would be among them. She hadn't looked into any of the other rooms as she walked down the hallway, and yet now she couldn't help but wonder about them…who else was here in this hospital, alone tonight?

And yet at the same time, that didn't matter, at least not to her. Taking a deep breath to steady herself, she walked over to the chair resting beside the bed and slowly sank down upon it. Her blue eyes looked over the figure lying on the hospital bed, her emotions steadily whirling into what could only be described as a looming hurricane, waiting to wreck its havoc with no notice. She felt like she shouldn't be here, and at the same time, she couldn't even imagine leaving…not now, not when he was like this…

There was no trace of the lively, smiling man who was once her employer, not in this lifeless figure on the bed. Monitors did his breathing for him, beeping steadily like a constant reminder of his lifeless state; he looked so much older now, with lines etched into his face that had never been there before. He looked pale, he looked broken, and he looked alone.

"They…they say they don't expect you…to wake up," she whispered softly, "I'm…I'm not a doctor, of course…you were always the one who knew so much about the human mind…but the way they talk, it looks like they might be true…but I don't want them to be true." There was a quiver in her voice now…something that she couldn't fight back even she tried, "I want to think that you'll pull through out of this…you always pulled out of everything…always…"

She swallowed, reaching into her purse and pulling out a book, "I…I stopped by the office on my way here. Dr. Cates hasn't done anything with your office, so Iris and I did a little fixing up…I think you'll like what we did with it…Iris says it looks a lot more like Wonderland now…I just think it looks more…well, like you, Jervis." She looked down at the book in her hands, "I…I brought this for you…you left it—well, I don't suppose you ever got the chance to actually come back and get it, did you? But…at any rate…here it is…" she set in on the small bedside table, the golden letters gleaming in the light, "I've never forgotten how happy you were when I gave it to you…I thought you wouldn't like it…I was certain that since you loved _Alice in Wonderland_ so much, you would already have a copy in your office. But you were so happy…I don't think I'd ever seen you that happy…well, unless…unless it was that night in the office…"

* * *

"_Gracious, what a storm…" Jervis said, gently lifting his secretary from her curled up position under her desk, "It's alright, Alice…the storm's over…"_

"_Are you sure?" she spoke in a soft whimper, slowly opening her eyes._

"_I'm sure…" he said kindly, leading her into his office, where he had lit a few candles, "The power ought to be back on shortly…at least I hope so. Here…" he handed her a cup, "I just put it on, so it should still be hot."_

_She took a few sips of the wonderfully warm tea, savoring the feel as it warmed her, "Thanks, Jervis…I'm a little embarrassed…that you found me like that…"_

"_Oh, pish tosh," he said, still smiling as he sipped his own tea, "It wasn't anything to be ashamed of, Alice…and frankly, I think you've found me in far more ridiculous positions."_

_She had to laugh, "Fair enough…." She smiled, feeling better now, "Thank you for staying with me…thunder has always scared me…ever since I was a little girl…I used to hide in the closet. Sometimes, my father had to come and get me, even hours after the storm had passed. I guess I just didn't know any better…because…well, I was alone." Her eyes rose up to his face, a gentle smile on her face, "Thank you…for not letting me be alone."_

_Fortunately, the dim light hid the blush that crept along his cheeks, "It…It was nothing…being alone…it's not a pleasant way to be, much less live."_

"_Is that why you never talk about your parents?" she asked softly, "Because…" she couldn't finish her sentence. However, he seemed to understand her question and nodded. "Yes," he answered, "When I was younger…"_

_She bit her lip slightly, "I…I'm sorry…" she said softly, "If it's any…consolation…I still have both my parents, but sometimes I feel like I don't. Daddy is never home…and even though Mother is home often…she never wants to talk to me, unless it's about whether or not I have a boyfriend."_

"_I was under the impression that whether or not someone is in love was a choice of the heart," Jervis answered, taking another sip, "Not a duty or a chore,"_

_She smiled, tears brimming her eyes slightly, "It shouldn't be…but Mother wants me to marry into good money…someone with high status and taste…"_

"_And what do you want?"_

_She paused, then looked down, "I…I don't know…I've never really thought about it. I've never been able to think about it…it isn't really my choice…"_

_His hand gently cupped her chin, lifting her face back up, "Someone as gentle, as kind…and as beautiful as you should never stop looking until you've found someone who appreciates you for all that you are."_

_She had to swallow back tears; her fingers touched his hand gently. Before she could say anything, the lights overhead flickered and suddenly sprang back to life. Both looked up._

"_Ah, much better…" Jervis said cheerfully, going around and extinguishing the candles, "I think you ought to go home, my dear…perhaps a relaxing bath would ease your mind after that dreadful ordeal…"_

_Alice nodded, "I think I will…" she said, going back to her desk to get her purse and coat. She paused, looking back to see Jervis working in his office, "Won't you head home too?"_

"_Oh, I will soon enough." He said pleasantly, "But for now, I've a few things to finish up first…"_

_She paused, then smiled slightly, "Jervis," she said, standing in his doorway, "I think there is one thing I do know I want…more than anything…"_

"_What might that be?" he asked, looking back at her._

_She reached over and kissed his cheek, "I wish I could marry someone like you…"_

* * *

"I mean it…when I said that…" she whispered, her voice growing thick from the constricting emotion building up in her voice, "I really, really did…you made me feel…wanted…I wasn't just a trophy…I wasn't just a puppet on strings, helpless to do anything but be pulled around…I was more than that. I could see that every time I looked into your eyes…I could see you thought I was worth more." Tears were slipped out her eyes, one by one, "The five years I worked for you…were the best…best years of my life. That night…everything went wrong…and yet…it wasn't. I've had to deal with people who won't listen to me…who can't accept that…that you didn't hurt me. Just like when you took me out for the night, you still treated me like a princess. Even when the District Attorney asked me what happened that night…I had to act like I didn't remember. But I did remember…I _did_, Jervis…I remembered everything. Especially…I remembered when you…kissed me. But I couldn't tell her…you know why? Because those memories weren't hers to know. They were between you and I, Jervis…they were our memories…only ours. People have been constantly telling me it was only because you never got the chance to do anything to me…but they don't know you." She smiled weakly even through her tears, "They don't know you like I do…just like no one knows me the way you do."

She hadn't even realized she was now sitting on the edge of the bed beside him, and it didn't really matter. By doing this, she was merely closer to him. She reached out, taking one of his hands and holding it to her face, trying to feel some comfort in his touch, though it was entirely lifeless. Tears slipped down her face, heavier than before…colder than ever. "You once told me…that I was the only one who understood you. _You_ were the only one who understood me, Jervis…you know me better than…than anyone…"

The emotional hurricane that had been growing inside her finally broke free. She could hardly breathe or think, she was crying so hard. She held his hand even tighter to her face, "Please…you have to wake up…you _have_ to! I can't…can't deal with this anymore. I need you, Jervis…I need you so much…please! Please come back to me…please don't leave me like this! Don't leave me alone with a world that has never tried to understand me! Don't leave me alone to marry someone I don't love! Oh, sometimes…sometimes I wish Batman had never come…I wish he had just left us alone…at least then we'd be together. Please…let us be together again, my dear friend…my angel…Jervis…Jervis, please…_please_!"

She lay down beside him, curling against him, tears soaking her face. She wasn't sure how long she laid crying against him, trying to either share her warmth with his lifeless form, or feel his own warmth. But soon enough, she found herself falling asleep.

A rather uncouth bantering startled Alice out of her sleep. The only thing she could feel was pure indignation at whoever had awoken her. She wanted to go back to sleep, against him, dreaming of their time together…undisturbed. However, it didn't seem that she would get her wish, as there was a wretched banging on the door once the person attempting to get inside realized that the nurse had locked the door.

* * *

"Open this door right this instant!" Alice swallowed as she recognized her mother's voice outside the door.

"Mr. Tetch has a visitor right now, madam!" the nurse sounded indignant, "As she asked not to be disturbed!"

"Alice, I know you're in there, young lady!" Sophia called, pounding the door, "Come along, dear! We've agreed to hold the wedding here in Gotham, but we only have a few hours to get everything done! Now come along!"

"Miss, please!"

"That's _Mrs._ to you!" Sophia snapped, "Alice, quickly, darling! Billy's waiting for you!"

Alice turned back to Jervis. Her fingers reached out to touch his face gently, "Jervis…" she whispered softly, leaning toward him, "I know you're in there…somewhere…and I know you'll come back…I know you'll come back to take me away…" a tear slipped out and fell down her face. She leaned even closer, and her lips kissed his. She wasn't sure how long she kissed him…a mere minute, ten minutes…all she knew was it felt like an eternity. She wondered if this was how he felt when he's kissed her.

"I love you, Jervis…" she whispered, "I'm sorry it turned out like this…"

By the time the door was finally opened, revealing a frazzled nurse and a very irate Sophia Pleasance, Alice just barely getting off the bed and into a standing position. Sophia rushed forward, "Come quickly, child! Oh gracious, there's so much to do and so little time to do it!"

"Mother, please—you're hurting me!" Alice protested, trying to loosen her mother's vice grip on her upper arm.

Sophia didn't seem to hear a word she said and continued to walk briskly down the hallway, "I can't believe you just ran away like that, Alice! You've made me drag your father, your fiancé, and god forbid, your poor grandmother! A woman of her age should not be traveling like this, young lady!"

"Mother—"

"Do _not_ interrupt me! That is quite rude and I raised you better than that! Now, let's go! You and Billy are getting married tomorrow night, and that is all! Now, walk faster! And for God's sake, stop slouching when you walk!!"


	14. You Do What You Have to Do

A/N: I apologize for the short length of this chapter. Next one will be longer, I promise! Please enjoy chapter 14!

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Chapter 14: You Do What You Have To Do

"Alice, for goodness sakes, _stop slouching_!"

For the umpteenth time in the past seven hours, which had been full of nothing but shopping, fittings, preparations, touring church after church after church after church, and of course, the endless scolding, Alice straightened up in the chair. Her head ached terribly from all the bobby pins that had been stuffed into her hair, scratching her scalp in the process; she had managed to avoid the hairspray, only by saying that it made her sick (which wasn't far from the truth) and her mother had baulked at the idea of her daughter being sick at the altar. So here she sat, stiff and aching, before a vanity while her mother rambled on. She wasn't sure what her mother was saying anymore…she had stopped listening hours ago.

"And most importantly, Alice, we must discuss how the honeymoon will go."

That got her attention quickly. Whirling around in the chair, Alice looked stunned, "Mother, what are you talking about?"

"Darling, if you don't do certain things, the honeymoon will be a disaster!"

"Mother, I thought the honeymoon was supposed to be a time when the _man_ makes the woman feel like she's a princess, not the other way around," Alice said softly, already having a feeling she knew what her mother was going to respond to that.

"Darling, don't be ridiculous! The only thing you ought to expect from the husband is riches and status! Nothing else." She laughed airily as though her daughter had made a clever joke, "No, darling…the honeymoon must be _all_ about the husband! You'll tend to his needs, his demands, everything he wants, you get for him! No questions asked! Anything he wants you to do with him or to him, you'll do that too! No objections, no compromises, nothing of the sort, do you understand?"

Alice didn't answer; her eyes fell away to the floor. The door opened.

"Sophia,"

"Oh, Sylvia!" she gushed, "Gracious, I _must_ apologize for my daughter's outrageous behavior! I know you shouldn't be traveling like this! It was quite irresponsible of her!"

"I shall make the decision as to what is irresponsible behavior, thank you," Sylvia said crisply, "I wish to speak with my grandchild...alone."

"Oh, of course!" she said, "I'll be back!"

* * *

Alice sighed, head in her hands. Suddenly, her grandmother's hand touched her shoulder gently. Looking up, she saw that Sylvia had hung up a garment bag. "Grandma, I already have a dress…"

"Hush, love," she said gently, "I wish to tell you a story…a story about your grandfather…"

Alice paused, then turned around to listen. "When I was younger, not too much younger than yourself, I worked at a small business firm. It wasn't much, but it was enough to get me through college. While I was there, I worked under a gentleman named Andrey. Like myself, he was Russian…he was a bit older than myself, but he always treated me like a person. Not unlike yourself, Alice, I grew up in a family where my one and only duty was to find a man with good money and status, nothing else. I was quite drawn to Andrey, and how could I not be? He was kind, gentle…always a gentleman…never treating me the way I had been raised to think I was supposed to be treated—like a puppet girl." Tears could be seen forming in her eyes as she continued, a soft, sad smile coming to her lips, "Andrey was my best friend…I was so incredibly fond of him…I felt like I could love him…and I felt like he would love him in return." She sighed softly, "But he wasn't good money…in fact, he had very little status, at least in my parents' eyes. And so I spent the next fifteen years looking for a man that would satisfy my parents. Of course, they found many that were suitable for me, at least in their opinion…somehow, I always managed to get out of the marriage. I made up several excuses, of course…never once actually admitting that I couldn't marry those other men because I was deeply in love with another."

"But…you and Grandpa ended up married, didn't you?" Alice whispered, feeling her heart start to physically ache at the parallels within her grandmother's story to her own life.

"By the time I was thirty-five, my father had all but given up trying to get me to marry, but Mother wasn't done," Sylvia said, shaking her head, "She was madly determined to get me married off…finally, I had enough and I left Russia for England. I found work as a dancer there…at a local club. Not the most high-class position, but it paid well and I still held my standards in place. Then, one day, I was dancing on stage, when I looked down in the front row…and there was my Andrey. He told me he had heard of a lovely Russian girl who was dancing in town, and he knew that there was only one girl who could be classified as Russian and with a beautiful voice and body…me."

Alice smiled, "He sounds like a flatterer…"

"Oh, he knew how to sweet talk, certainly," Sylvia laughed gently, "But he got down on his knee right there in front of everyone and asked me to marry him. I told him I wouldn't say yes until he did one thing…"

"What was that?" she asked, eyes wide with curiosity.

"I told him if he took me home—wherever he wished home to be," Sylvia answered, her eyes shining, "And made love to me all night long…then I would say yes."

Alice felt something inside her clench painfully, bringing tears to her eyes. She raised a shaking hand to try and wipe them away, but they were already falling down her face, "And…you married him?"

Sylvia nodded, standing up and opening the garment bag to reveal a wedding dress. It was simple and completely stunning; the skirt fell gently down to the floor with a flowing train. The bodice was just as simple, with whalebone trimming down the torso to the subtly defined waist; the sleeves rested low on the shoulders, with sleeves that ended in a V on the middle knuckle. The entire dress, rather than being the plain traditional white, was a soft, frosty blue. It reminded Alice of the moonlight gracing over the sea.

"Yes," Sylvia said, her voice a soft caress to the ears, "I was disowned by my family, especially after they found out I conceived his child…but it didn't matter."

"But…" Alice swallowed hard, her throat aching slightly, "How could you give it all up, Grandmamma? How could you sacrifice your family?"

"I sacrificed people who had raised me to think that I was worth nothing more than a financial transaction," Sylvia answered softly, reaching out and cupping Alice's chin, "And, my sweet little girl, so are you….you are being raised to believe the same of yourself."

"I…I have nothing else to hold onto to…" she choked out, "The one thing I had to hold onto…" she tried to pull herself together, though tears still slipped down, "He was my best friend! He was the only person who wanted me for _me_…the one person who needed me, because I was all he had, and he was all I had. He wanted me, he needed me…and he _loved_ me! And just when we might have been together…he was ripped away from me. And he's been ripped away from me over and over and over again! What do I have left?"

Sylvia touched her face, "Darling, listen to me…for years I made my choice to be duty and family over true love…and in the end, yes, I lost my family, but I gained a new family. And he was well worth the wait…as your true love is as well…"

Alice paused, looking up into her grandmother's eyes…it was just like looking into Iris' eyes. "Alice…make your own decisions for your own life. Don't make the same mistakes I made. Make your own mistakes—there will be plenty of them, believe me!"

Alice bit her lip slightly, only to look back up and see her grandmother holding out a pendant in her hands. "Now…" she said gently, draping it over her neck, "You can walk out there and get married…or you can walk away. Whatever choice you make…let it come from your heart."

Alice paused, holding the pendant in the palm of her hand. "Without the promise…the heart would…die. The heart can only continue to beat…while the blade of promise…the promise of love…is piercing it. If the promise dies…so will the heart…"

She suddenly stood up, throwing her arms around her grandmother, "I see now, Grandma…I really understand now…"

Sylvia touched her face gently, "You do what you have to, sweet one…"

She nodded, "Goodbye, Grandma…"


	15. Back to Wonderland

A/N: I hereby dedicate this chapter to Mad Maiden and lost soul's keeper. Here is what you've been looking forward to, my dears! Please review!

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Chapter 15: Back to Wonderland

Alice sat on the couch, staring blankly at the fire hearth, watching the fire burning; the flames jumped up and licked the brick walls, leaving their mark. She looked up at the mirror, hanging proudly over the fireplace, reflecting loyally. With a sigh, she stood and approached the gleaming glass. A young woman stared back at her; the blonde hair was drawn up in an elegant arrangement of curls, and the girl in the mirror wore the white dress—a bride's dress for the wedding she had just run away from. Her mother had selected it for her several months ago, without Alice's knowledge, of course. She vaguely wondered what they were all doing at the church now. Did they know she was missing yet? Probably not. Of course, the first place they would go would be her house, not here at her father's private estate in the mountains. At least here she knew she would be safe, in a place where no one tried to tell her where to go and what to do.

Lately, it seemed that everyone was making decisions for her life without her consent or input. When had she, at twenty-three years old, become a toddler who couldn't make any choices for her life, who had to have everyone else hold her hand and help her walk on her own two feet? Why couldn't she decide whom she wanted to marry? Who she wanted to love…to spend the rest of her life with? She didn't love Billy…she wasn't sure when the love died…or even if it was ever there to fade away. No…it was never there. She had merely hidden behind it to try and ignore the wishes dwelling deep within her heart and soul…

Yes…it was not Billy whom she had dreamt of all those nights. It was not Billy that she had longed to hold her, whisper sweet things to her…comfort her when she was crying and weak…not Billy, never Billy. It was Jervis who had come to her after Billy had abandoned her. It was Jervis who rushed to the rescue like a knight to save fair lady. And it had been such a glorious night! Especially the dance….oh, the dance…

Alice sighed miserably, resting a hand on the wall. She should have understood then. As they danced across that green park…she should have seen the longing in his eyes, and the love hidden behind the desire. She shouldn't have questioned her own feelings either. She should have embraced the subtle sorcery that lingered in her heart every time they talked, or even made eye contact; she should have basked in the fire his smile used to start, and even the memory of his smile kindled a fire deep inside.

Now, instead of the happy, bubbly girl she used to be, Alice was staring at a young woman who had been molded by family and society…the exact thing that she promised Iris she would never become. She resumed examining herself in the mirror. The dress was an almost blinding shade of white—white satin lined with velvet. The sleeves puffed out like marshmallows, ending tightly on the wrists. The skirt resembled an upside-down mushroom. It was the ugliest dress ever, especially because it was not her. There was no trace of the real Alice in this dress, or in the mirror for that matter. She reached behind her, fingers nimbly finding the zipper and yanking it down, not really caring if the material ripped or not. She pulled it down from her shoulders, shoving it in the garment bag. The underdress was actually much more appealing—a thin-strapped top with a fitted bodice, dipping down with a subtle V-neck; the skirt was silk, trailing well down her figure and pooling around her feet. The soft, cool material clung to the shape of her legs. She sighed again, pulling her hair down from its bonds. Soft blonde curls tumbled down, sliding off her shoulders and down her back.

She felt alone here…even the warmth from the fire couldn't make her feel any better. She was still cold inside…not an external cold, but an internal chill that could only come from feeling complete and utter emptiness. A tear slipped down her face.

"Alice?"

* * *

Her heart stopped beating immediately as she heard the voice. It couldn't be…could it?

"Jervis?" she whispered, turning around with widened eyes.

Sure enough, Jervis Tetch stood in her house. He wore his Mad Hatter attire, minus his hat, which she spotted hanging on the rack beside the door. He bit his lower lip, "The…the door was open," he murmured apologetically.

"Oh…I should go…close it, shouldn't I?" she whispered, torn between crying from sheer relief and hugging him tightly. She hurried to the door, locking it, though she took a longer time than really needed, so she could collect her thoughts. All sort of questions rushed through her mind. How had he found her? Who had told him about this place? Iris, perhaps? Or maybe even her father…did it even matter? He was here, and he was alright.

When she turned back around, she saw that Jervis was standing, hands against the couch, staring blankly into the fire. His expression was nothing short of miserable.

"Jervis, what's wrong?" she asked, touching his arm.

"It's…it's nothing." He said, trying to smile.

"When were you released from the hospital?" she asked.

"Earlier today." He answered, "They say…you paid for the expenses."

"Yes," she said softly, "I figured…you probably didn't have a lot of funds left over to pay."

"That was unnecessary." He said, "Besides, what will your fiancé say about—"

"There is no fiancé." She said.

He looked truly shocked. "But…you're wearing a dress…I thought…what happened?"

"There was no love between us…" she said softly. Why couldn't she say it? Why didn't he see—

"I'm sorry to have bothered you…" he said quietly, "I should go…"

"Dance with me." She said. She didn't even know why she'd said that. All she wanted was for him to stay with her. She didn't want him to leave her…never again.

He blinked, trying to discern whether or not he had actually heard her correctly. "Here…?" he asked, looking around in shock.

"Yes, here." She said, taking his hands. She set one on her waist, and held onto the other one tightly, "Dance with me."

* * *

Although there was no music playing, Alice felt as though she could still hear some as they danced around her living room. She had given up trying to keep a "polite distance" a few minutes ago and laid her head on his chest, hearing the gentle murmur of his heart. Her hands rested on his shoulders, keeping them close together. His arms were around her, unsure and yet loving. Behind her, she heard the clock chime nine o'clock. He stiffened, as though startled out of a dream, but she kept her hold on him. This was not a Cinderella story, where they only had until midnight. No…they had the entire night still. And if he still wanted her, still loved her, then they wouldn't just have all night. They would have forever…the rest of their lives together.

"Jervis," she stopped him with a hand to his shoulder. As he turned around, she wrapped his hand around something. He opened his palm, staring down in shock at a pendant that he thought he would never see again: a ruby red heart with a gold-hilted dagger piercing it; around the hilt was wrapped a crimson rose. He swallowed from shock and a painful flood of memories.

"I know this was your promise to me then," she whispered, looking in his soft blue eyes, "I need to know…is it your promise to me now?"

Tears burned at his eyes, tears which he fought to hold back. "Alice…"

"I need to know," she said quietly, "Please tell me."

"It was always my promise," he murmured, stroking the pendant slowly, "It can't have changed, remember?"

A soft smile curved her lips, "Without the promise…the heart will die…"

"Yes," he murmured again. Her smile seemed to give him the confidence he needed, as he spun her out and twirled her back to his chest. Her smile widened all the more; he lightly dipped her down. When he raised her back up, the sight stunned him speechless. Her blonde curls tumbled off her shoulders and down her back like water cascading down a mountain side; the firelight danced on her skin, giving it a stunning, angelic glow. When her eyes open to gaze into his, there was a new light in them…a gentle fire, like an ember just before it faded into the ashes of a fire. Her hand slid up from his arm to his chest; the touch sent a quaking shiver straight down his body.

"Jervis…" she whispered. Her hands moved around his neck, pulling him to her mouth and claiming his lips.

A shock went straight through his nerves, replaced by mind-numbing pleasure at the feel of her lips. His arms tightened around her, pulling her closer and returning the kiss. His mind was so consumed by the kiss that he didn't even register her hands pushing his coat from his shoulders. But when her hands touched his chest, covered only by the lime-green shirt, he started, holding her shoulders and breaking the kiss.

"Alice…wait…"

"What? What's wrong?" she asked, startled slightly.

"I know what you're suggesting…and I can't." he said softly.

"Jervis…please…" she said, feeling tears burn her own eyes.

"No…No, I cannot!" he said, stunned with the request she was seeking of him, "You cannot promise me thi—"

Her hand rested gently over his mouth, all hesitation and fear gone from her eyes. "Do you believe I would be so cruel as to offer you this, only to rip it away from you?"

"You don't know what you offer…" he shook his head, trying not to look into her eyes, "Billy…"

"Is not here," she said softly, "He will never be here again. I don't love him, I don't want him, Jervis. I want you!"

"You know not what you offer…" he repeated, trying to block out the desperation in her eyes and voice, as well as the burning hope her words were kindling in him…hope he had long since forgotten how to feel.

"I am offering you all of me," she whispered. "Forget about everything that happened before, Jervis…tonight, we belong to each other. I cannot change what happened that night…but I can change our future."

He bit his lip slightly, "Alice…are you sure…?"

"Yes," she whispered, reading the question in his eyes perfectly. She had never been surer of anything than she was of what she wanted right now. "I want to feel you, Jervis. I want to feel you like I never have before…I want to feel things I've never even imagined. I want you…please…" Her fingers ran through his soft hair, feeling him shudder at the intimate touch, "I want you to take me away from here…take me to a different world…take me to Wonderland…where we can be together…"

He never believed such joy could run through his mind. Alice…his Alice…wanting him like he always had wanted her. There was no mind control now, no false pretenses, only truth—undeniable truth.

* * *

She took his hands, guiding him up the stairs, all the while smiling at him. Once they'd reached the landing, her arms wrapped around him, kissing him again, much more passionately than before. He reached behind her, finding the door handle and pushing it open, closing it once they were safely inside. He sighed softly as he felt her hands under his shirt, gently caressing the skin. A shiver ran through him at her touch. She carefully pushed the clothing upward; he raised his arms in compliance, breaking the kiss reluctantly for his shirt to be removed. Her eyes swept over him, smiling. "You're so handsome…" she breathed, kissing his neck gently.

His hands went to her hair, noting that somehow or another, his gloves had been removed as well. Her hair was soft silk on his fingers, slipping through like water. Her hands fell down his chest, feeling over the skin with a longing touch. His hands gently ran over her shoulders and arms, as though feeling a precious, priceless artifact. His fear was evident in his eyes, something she did not fail to notice.

"It's okay…" she said softly, taking his hand in hers, "It's okay, Jervis…you can touch me…"

"I…"

"Shhh…" she murmured in his ear, setting his hand to her thigh and guiding it upward, "It's okay…feel that?"

The skin under his hand sent a rush of shivers up his spine, silencing any answer he could have given her. Nonetheless, his silence seemed to be an acceptable answer, as she smiled and guided him to run his hand up and down her thigh, "That's right…it's okay, Jervis…touch me…touch me…"

Deciding to take over, to make up for lost time, he pushed the straps of her dress down her arms, baring her shoulders for him. His mouth pressed against her skin, kissing with restrained passion. She whispered something that sounded like his name, her hands tangling in his hair, holding him in place. "Jervis…more, please more…"

Resistance and inhibitions breaking with her words, he moved down to her chest, gently pushing the dress down. His hands relocated on her sides, just above where the dress lay pooled around her figure. As his lips marked and memorized her soft, warm skin, he felt her hands slid up his spine, over his shoulders, and resting on her own body. He obeyed her silent request, watching, mesmerized, as she slowly pushed the gown from her body. The soft white silk slid easily down her body, pooling on the floor around her feet. He gently took her hands and guided her to step out of the dress and back into his arms, where his mouth's caresses continued desperately and passionately. Her hushed whispers of pleasure turned quickly to quiet moans. Her mind was spinning at the loving nature of his kisses, and the protective manner in which he held her, as though afraid an intruder would come and steal her away.

"I'm not going anywhere, Jervis…" she whispered, feeling herself fall onto the covers of her bed, "I'm here…I'm yours forever…"

"Alice…" he breathed, feeling tears sting his eyes, "My Alice…my angel…"

She smiled, hand slipping between them. He felt the rest of his clothes leave him, allowing her hands to explore his body freely. He kissed her neck deeply before returning the favor, holding her bare form like she was a precious china doll. She brought his face back up to hers, deepening the kiss to explore the warm cavern of his mouth.

"Jervis…" she whispered, breaking away from the kiss, her eyes glowing, "Claim me for your own, love."

In response to his worried expression, she kissed his neck again and again, hands roaming over his back and sides before sliding up to his chest, "It's alright, my sweet…"

"Are you…sure…?" he whispered breathlessly. He had to make sure before he went any further.

"I want you, Jervis." She murmured, "Please…make love to me, my angel…"

Before he could answer, her lips were near his ear, and she whispered the three words he never thought he would hear from his precious Alice.

"I love you."

* * *

Her hands held onto him, her head pressed back into the covers. "Jervis...Jervis…"

"You're so beautiful…" he whispered against her shoulder, moving inside of her gently and yet passionately. She looked absolutely stunning, her blonde hair fanned out around her, framing her face; her eyes sparkling with passion; her soft, warm lips parted as she whispered his name, murmured sweet words in his ear. Her warm skin against his set his nerves afire, fueling the fire of passion already kindling within him. Passion overwhelmed him, and he moved faster, encouraged by her cries of pleasure.

Her legs entwined with his, her chin on his shoulder so she could whisper easily in his ear. Her voice wove into his mind like a muse, breathing such heavenly words.

"Jervis…!" she moaned, holding on to him as tight as possible, "Jervis…my Jervis!"

"Alice…." He whispered, feeling the edge of sweet bliss draw nearer. Her legs tightened around his waist, keeping him against her, their bodies melted into each other, two hearts fusing forever as one.

"Oh…angel, take me to paradise….." she whispered, feeling release beckon her, "Take me back to your Wonderland!!!"

"Yes…oh yes…."

"Take me, my darling Hatter…" she moaned with pure longing, "Take me back to Wonderland…bring me back there. Never let me leave…"

"No…no, never…" his mind was gone, "I need you…I love you…"

"I love you, Jervis," she breathed, "Oh…Oh god…" pleasure hit her with wonderful intensity.

Her name was the last word from his mouth before all went blissfully white with release.

_

* * *

_

It was a dream,

Jervis told himself firmly, _I dreamt that I came to Alice's house. I dreamt that she kissed me. I dreamt that we made love. It was all a dream. When I wake up, I'm going to be in my own house, in my own bed, alone_. He sighed sadly. It had been such a wonderful dream….

And yet, as he fully came to, Jervis noted that these sheets didn't feel like his. They were silky, not the stiff cotton of his bed. And there were at least two pillows under his head, whereas he only had one on his bed. He opened his eyes. These weren't his curtains…or his carpet…

He froze. He definitely did not make a habit of sleeping without clothes. And he didn't go to sleep with two arms around him and a head on his chest. Slowly, he looked down, seeing Alice sleeping contently against him. He sighed with a smile. Maybe it hadn't been a dream after all.

"Good morning, handsome," she murmured, kissing his chest gently. He smiled all the more, "Hello, angel."

"Did something wake you up?" she asked, looking concerned.

"No, my darling." He assured her.

She looked relieved, "Good," she nuzzled against him, hands caressing his chest.

"I love you…" he whispered.

"And I love you," she answered,

He kissed her hand, "Alice…"

"Hm?"

He swallowed. "Alice…I love you…I've waited my whole lonely life for you…will you…will you marry me?"

Alice's eyes opened. Her heart immediately soared up to the heavens with sheer joy; he had asked it…he had really asked it…a smile curved her lips.

Sitting up a bit, to look at him properly, "I can't answer that yet…" touching his face to soothe the saddened look off, she continued, "But…if you stay with me all day…and you make love to me all night long…then I'll say yes."


End file.
